Scarlet has a red-hot message for her husband. I hope he's sitting down when he reads it: when Scarlet says she wants to be possessed, she really means it!

No one wants a controlling partner, but many want a dominant one. What is the difference?

In this charming article, which I know will speak to lots of women, and help men understand how many women feel, Amber writes about her childhood irritation with helpless movie heroines, and about her later discovery that being submissive does not have to mean giving up your strong, independent, effective self.

Melanie asks: How do you submit to a man who won't do what you need him to do? She has been getting very frustrated, and after this got so bad that she threw things, her husband spanked her. Help, please!

Why does this kind of relationship work? Tevemer says that the more her husband asserts himself, the more she respects and desires him. Why does it work for you?

If you are in a new relationship, or have yet to find a man, and you want to be with a man who is lovingly dominant, you might like to consider this advice.

Joan enthuses excitedly about a mind-blowing experience of hers: the first time ever her boyfriend Alan took her in hand. As she says, being taken in hand has powerful effects!

If you like the idea of a Taken In Hand relationship but you have had trouble explaining what you want, or even identifying clearly what you want, this article is for you!

When Caroline last wrote, she feared she had awoken a sleeping dragon. Now she relates how the flames felt. Hot stuff!

The other day, I heard the Queen song, I want it all, and have not been able to get it out of my head since. Sometimes I am so aware of how much there is to feel and do and experience before it's game over, that it is difficult to be patient. I want it all, and I want it now! If this sounds like you, you won't want to miss this article!

If you can't imagine why anyone would want to be spanked, and can't imagine what possible positive feelings it could occasion, hit the read article link. This powerful, poignant piece by Annie is very illuminating.

If a woman finds the idea of being taken in hand erotic, how can taking her in hand also ’work’ to modify her behaviour? Spanking would be a reward, not a punishment! Wouldn't it be more efficient to withhold spanking? Nooooooooooo! Hit the read article link to find out why not!

Why is it that most conventional people find themselves settling for stale, lifeless relationships with unsatisfying sex, whereas people writing on Taken In Hand often mention that their desire for one another is greater than ever even after many years?

We have received an important communication from a chap called Dermot, writing from England. He says:

If i want submission, I'd prefer to ... buy a sheepdog and call him ‘old faithful’

Two weeks ago, Caroline asked her husband to read Taken In Hand. He refused to discuss it and she thought he was absolutely opposed to the idea – until last night.

If you feel no sexual arousal at all during serious disciplinary spankings, how can it possibly be erotic? And if it is, doesn't that mean that it is all just a kinky game, and not real? Hit the read article link for my answers to these thorny questions.

Okay, I confess! I misled you. This is not about the ‘M’ word as in ‘marriage’, it is about the ‘M’ word as in ‘maintenance spanking’. If you feel, or your woman feels, frustatingly unsatisfied by ‘maintenance spanking’, you won't want to miss this!

If your man often keeps you waiting (and not in a good way!),

Str8 Talkin' Mutha has some naughty table-turning advice for you. Well they do say fortune favours the brave...

Howard Frank explains his gentle but firm hands-on approach with his wife, and talks about what he has discovered on this journey of increased connection and intimacy.

Advice for women who think that their men might be reluctant to take control and discipline them more seriously.

Read this review of Liberated Through Submission, by P. Bunny Wilson, or add your own review by clicking here and scrolling down to the ‘reply’ box.

Ben and his wife have been married 33 years. About eighteen months ago, his wife announced that she wanted to be ‘surrendered’ (as in The Surrendered Wife, by Laura Doyle). To enjoy Ben's delectable real life adult fairy tale, hit the read article link.

What do you say when somone notices that you have blossomed and they want to know why? What do you say if that someone is your sister, and she fears you are having an affair, and when you start to explain, she asks accusingly, “Does he hit you?”

A woman's letter to her hypothetical husband.

Blush is on top form as she relates some subtle but incredibly hot romantic rituals she enjoys in everyday situations courtesy of her lovingly dominant husband, Gary.

Susie Joy enthuses about how things have developed over the first year of her marriage to Robert. Two things that helped were that he took her out of a stressful job, and that he spanks her whenever he thinks fit.

Many of you have read Blush's beautiful articles about her fabulously loving and wildly passionate relationship with her husband, Gary. But what does Gary have to say about it? Could he possibly be as wonderful as Blush says he is? I am thrilled to be able to present Gary's side of the story here. And when you read it, I think you will agree that the answer to the question I have just asked is a resounding yes.

Susie had dreamt alI her life about having a man strong enough to be in charge and to take her in hand. So why, she asks, was her first year of living with her dream man so dreadfully difficult? For the answer, and to find out how everything got resolved, hit the read article link.

I have often read that women want different things from their husbands, and feel that they need to talk or explain or show them excerpts from sites or discussion lists to help them understand what their role is. I have never thought that way. I never thought I had a role to play or Gary had to fulfill something. I was lucky enough (or strongly encouraged) to be simply myself.

For more of this original piece by Blush, hit the read article link.

Right from the beginning of their relationship, Stephen's wife wanted him to wear the trousers. She was not interested in a relationship based on so-called equality. She expects to be obedient. To her, obedience is not only a matter of respect for me and our relationship, it adds an erotic charge to daily life. Yes, obedience is sexy. It is romantic. It creates passion!

Each to his own, but for me, “safeword” = boredom, BDSM, artificiality, playing uninteresting, stereotypical games, etc., etc. Doug, too, has some interesting questions about the use of safewords – but in this thoughtful article, he concludes that ultimately it doesn't really much matter in practice whether a safeword exists or not. (BTW, my comment above should not be taken to imply that I have anything against BDSM. I don't at all. It is just not my cup of tea, that's all.)

Some people like having lists of rules to adhere to, but for anyone who doesn't, Daisy argues persuasively for throwing out the idea of house rules and any other unwelcome micromanagement which might be causing resentment.

This fascinating and clearly very honest article by Brandy is about the journey she and her husband have travelled to blanket consent, and highlights the increased emotional connection this affords.

How Susie Joy found her prince...

After the flak we've been getting lately, I was pleasantly surprised to discover that The Yeti described Taken In Hand as: “A very cool site about married people.” Must be being sarcastic, I thought. (Well gosh, we seem to be regarded as in need of psychiatric help by even the nicest, most open-minded folks.) But to my amazement, I don't think he was being sarcastic.

In this exuberant and very interesting article, Issie explains that the way she and her husband choose to relate is not about pointless physical punishments but about traditional roles which obviate the ubiquitous battles for leadership and consequent disharmony.

Blush, on the subject of what happens when her wonderful husband Gary has disappointed her or made an error in judgement.

Annie on obedience and autonomy in her wonderful relationship.

Janet Hardy passes on the advice she received when she asked how to introduce a new man to what she wants in a relationship.

Charlotte on why she loves Helen Andelin's book, Fascinating Womanhood.