Letter to a potential partner

People often ask, “How do I introduce this subject to a potential or new partner?” For some of us, this is very difficult. In this letter she wrote Larry before they got together, Kathy makes it look easy! The question is: what did you say in your profiles? Do you say what you want up-front and frighten everyone off, or do you save the shocking stuff for later? Comments, anyone?

Why men start and why they stop

What is wrong with men? Have they completely lost the dominant, decisive, proactive, self-confident traits that we all consider masculine? The basic message of this superb article by Egghead is that they have not.

Is he who (or where) he says he is?

When using the internet in your search for a partner, what very simple check can you run on your correspondents to identify at least a proportion of those who are not who they say they are? If you don't know, you need to read this article! Even if you do, you won't want to miss Robin's advice about how to weed out the nutjobs.

I'm so lucky to have found the right man

Issie's husband Mark is so strong and centred and emotionally intelligent that Issie didn't want to win the battle for supremacy within their household...

My fascinating journey

Cynthia Turner introduces the book that changed her marriage and her life, Fascinating Womanhood, by Helen Andelin. Look out for future articles discussing this book.

Cherishing the family: little things have big effects

Blush on the little things she does for her family that are so noticed.

The path

Aiden on the natural unity of masculine dominance and feminine submission.

American Beauty meets The Surrendered Wife

For any woman who tends to be controlling, MamaKat recommends The Surrendered Wife.

The dual failures of men

Although rarely explicit, a woman will frequently give implicit permission to a man to do whatever is necessary to keep the relationship together. She then expects him to act on her permission... If the man fails to act in a timely fashion, whatever love the woman has for him will, in time, crumble into a loathing for which there is no human cure.

The Taming of the Shrew

If you like Taken In Hand and you don't know this play, you are in for a treat if you read this article. (Fear not! No knowledge of archaic language assumed!) If you too love this play, you will want to know which is the best production available on DVD/video, and which ones to avoid.

When I'm in overdrive...

Blush, on how, when she is in overdrive, Gary asserts himself in the most gentle yet dominant of ways to slow her down and soothe her.

Is this a victory?

Power and Love quotes this interesting article from Salon.com:

Women secretly want men with authority, but they fall for insecure passive-aggressive guys who view every aspect of life as a power struggle, or for cranky killjoys or petty sadists [....] The women have won, if you've won when you have worse sex than your grandmother did. Secretly they don't find these men very exciting, either. And they don't feel feminine when they're with them. [...] What's often lost in the insistence on equality is quality – how the people feel about each other, how much love they can give each other. We now feel queasy about the romantic language of our ancestors, who used the metaphors of slavery and devotion unabashedly. But is there another language with which to speak of love? Love does involve two people putting themselves in the power of each other. [...] The heterosexual act of love does involve women putting themselves literally in the power of men. And we no longer trust enough to do so.

Reaching out by offering yourself

When everything goes wrong and your man is about to withdraw and give you the silent treatment, what can you do to reconnect with him? Here's one idea.

Creating an unbreakable bond of love takes time

Blush had to wait and wait before Gary would take her in hand physically. Gary was in control.

Ms. Damen [should be] taken in hand (I jest!)

Ms. Damen feels so dirty after reading Karen's piece that she feels the need to take a shower. “I honestly thought drivel like this only popped up in Penthouse letters,” she fumes. Hmmm, Penthouse letters, eh? Presumably the implication is that Karen's piece is intended to be erotic. Imagine my surprise, then, when I read Ms. Damen's next stinging blow (oops, no allusion to spanking intended)...

The sweetest “Benevolent Dictatorship” ever

Darrell called what he and Kathy had, a Benevolent Dictatorship. For Kathy's account, click the read article link.

A need for control

Sharron explains that of the three types of submission – obedience, service, and control – her primary need is for control.

Dominant to the last

A beautiful and poignant tale of passionate love and dominance to the last, by the wonderful Kathy.

Total obedience?

Do you think that the woman should be obedient at all times, in the sense that, aside from playful disobedience, she obeys without question come what may?

The night that changed our marriage for ever

To read about the night two decades ago that changed Karen's marriage for ever, click the read article link.

Finding a good man

Frank Nelson offers hope and some very good advice for women seeking a good man.

Quiet authority

Sassy on what it means for a man to have quiet authority.

White hot intensity and boundless joy

Blush on why she likes submission – the power she feels in being loved this intensely, the incredible connection.

Don't go into your cave, get out your preferred implement!

An impassioned plea to men to stop going into their cave and start getting out the wooden spoon.

Tradition, feminism, Victoria and Albert

The phrase taken in hand comes from the expressed sentiment that there are times in a woman's life when a man needs to take her in hand and straighten her out.

To let go

To read the Blush's white hot piece about how, to her great joy, her husband uses her to relax and wind down after a stressed-out day as a high-powered executive, click the read article link below.

Where are all the strong men?

Janet has tried dating New Men and has found them unexciting. She likes to be aware of the difference between her and her man. In this piece, she explains why.

Laying the groundwork for other possibilities

A good relationship makes it easier to be a better parent, a better friend, and a caring member of a larger community.

What you need to know about Taken In Hand

What is Taken In Hand about? A return to times past in which many women had no choice? Or stepping into a future free from prescriptions and proscriptions about the sort of relationships deemed acceptable? If you are in any doubt, hit the read article link now!

Is a Taken In Hand relationship for everyone?

Is a Taken In Hand relationship for everyone?

Is Taken In Hand about discipline?

Is Taken In Hand about discipline?