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 <li><a href="node/182" title="Read this post.">Each relationship is a unique work in progress</a></li>
 <li><a href="node/1683" title="Read this post.">How Taken In Hand makes the mundane erotic</a></li>
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 <li><a href="node/231" title="Read this post.">An 1897 woman's “ideal of manhood”</a></li>
 <li><a href="he.is.in.charge.but.i.do.it.my.way" title="Read this post.">He's in charge. . .  but I do it my way</a></li>
 <li><a href="book.review.of.the.king.of.the.dark.chamber.by.rabindranath.tagore" title="Read this post.">The King of the Dark Chamber, by Rabindranath Tagore: a book review</a></li>
 <li><a href="could.this.kind.of.relationship.be.for.you" title="Read this post.">Could this kind of relationship be for you?</a></li>
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 <li><a href="node/142" title="Read this post.">The appeal of a very feminine woman</a></li>
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<h2 class="title">Taken In Hand accolades</h2>
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<p><i>&#8220;[S]ince the day I [discovered <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>] I have rediscovered my feminity.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/node/1339#comment-9878" target="_blank">Saima from Pakistan</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is] a necessary read... Very complex, lots of power shifts, combining respect with pain, and pleasure. Domination roles. Submissive roles. The whole shebang. I'm glad I found it.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://dutchman55555.livejournal.com/8221.html" target="_blank">Dutchman</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>... is the name of a website that I discovered  less than two years ago and which made a big difference to my life.  It made me understand what it was I wanted and helped me to come to terms with my own feelings and gave me the impetus to talk seriously to my husband about our relationship for the first time ever really. The site is about male-led relationships which do not necessarily have to involve spanking.  The owner of the site is more interested in other aspects of male control. There are a lot of interesting articles on the site.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/1domesticdiscipline/message/35475" target="_blank">Louise C</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is male led but male intimately led. ... I do like the <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> focus on family and the focus that marriage is between one man and one woman.  That is actually very important to me.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Taken_In_Hand/message/1012" target="_blank">Frank Nelson</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[I]n <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>, I am enhancing and extending my power as a woman, and enriching my life and personality. I give up NOTHING, and gain the world.... [M]y perception of <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is that there are few other venues that can compare for teaching men the responsible, healthy uses of power. It gives men skills and confidence they can use not just in their sexual relationships, but also with their children, in their professions, and out in the community. <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> requires a far higher level of courage, sacrifice, responsibility, and personal integrity than many so-called &#8216;doms&#8217; will even think to aspire to.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Taken_In_Hand/message/1010" target="_blank">Sara</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is about having the man in charge because you like it like that, it's not about blind obedience or never having your own way about anything.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Taken_In_Hand/message/1004" target="_blank">Louise</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;I feel the best spanking site is <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken in Hand</a>.  I have referred hundreds of people to that site and have the link on my Yahoo profile.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/JewishPowerExchange/message/6124" target="_blank">Tess</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;First of all, all you guys should check out this website,  <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/">www.takeninhand.com</a>, very interesting stuff here, check out the <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/node/125">Commanding Presence</a>  [and] <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/node/342">Alpha Males</a> articles, [...] very valuable insights. [...] I'm taken by this site.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/seduction_dating/message/971" target="_blank">Eric</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[U]ntil 2 days ago I thought I was a crazy, ... abnormal<br />
woman. [T]hen I stumbled onto the <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken in Hand</a> website. I have never felt such relief, such internal peace in my life. This whole idea of being loved and trusting enough in another to place my, his and our well-being into his hands was exactly what I have been searching for my whole life. I spent 16 hours just reading... It is like a huge weight has lifted off my shoulders.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/1domesticdiscipline/message/33437" target="_blank">Melissa</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;I enjoyed [<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>] very much and I recommend that everyone here visits it.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Profound_submission/message/15848" target="_blank">Loveart</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is serious about the nature of male-female relationships, dominance, submission (not the leather-and-stud kind), in way I find exhilarating, honest, refreshing, courageous, and exciting.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://honeybunlife.blogspot.com/2005/02/taken-in-hand-i-want-to-be-possessed.html" target="_blank">HoneyBun</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>: Fascinating BDSM blog that deals with difficult and hot topics!&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://www.submissivewomenspeak.net/links.htm" target="_blank">Polly Peachum</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;The <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken in Hand</a> website has proven to be a valuable source for intelligent and well thought out articles exploring [male-led relationships]. [...] For women who have longed for a relationship such as this and have no idea where to start, this is a great site for you.  For men that want to better understand the whole concept from a women’s point of view, this site is a must read.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://www.thespankingblog.com/index.php/weblog/comments/domestic_discipline_articles_spanked_wife_punished_spouse/" target="_blank">Michael Masterson</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;It's a great site.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.msn.com/DomesticDisciplineandHOHRelationships/general.msnw?action=get_message&#038;mview=1&#038;ID_Message=2754" target="_blank">Gem</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;If you think <b>my</b> perspective on dating isn't politically correct you should go read <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>. [It has] posts with titles like, <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/when.rape.is.a.gift" title="Read this post">When rape is a gift</a>. You go, girl.  Defy those hairy-armpitted feminists and enjoy yourself. :)&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://jacquelinepassey.blogs.com/blog/2004/04/if_you_think_my.html" target="_blank">Jacqueline Passey</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;great site.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Profound_submission/message/15658" target="_blank">valerie</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;There are lots of websites for people in the BDSM, D/s, DD (domestic discipline) and spanking communities. There are websites for people who belong to religions that advocate male-head-of-household marriage. There are even websites for Christians who are interested in BDSM. But there are very few websites for people who are interested in male-led intimate relationships but who are not interested in all that the above communities associate with this kind of relationship (jargon, clothes, etc.)<br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Some of us don't even like thinking of this as a lifestyle. [...]<br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;If you are interested in this kind of relationship but are not interested in BDSM or D/s or DD or spanking websites, there's a new website for you: <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://www.powerandlove.com/cgi-bin/blosxom.cgi/power/taken_in_hand.writeback" target="_blank">Tom Newman</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>] is really the most beautiful website devoted to DD.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.msn.com/DomesticDisciplineandHOHRelationships/general.msnw?action=get_message&#038;mview=1&#038;ID_Message=1860" target="_blank">PaLady</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>] is my major kink&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://bondage.com/topic_id/101212/p/3/forums/topic.html" target="_blank">Spoiledgrrl</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is an] erudite and intelligent site&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://www.submissivewife.org/wisdom1.html" target="_blank">Emily Cox</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is a]n excellent site with many thought-provoking articles and responses.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.msn.com/DomesticDisciplineandHOHRelationships/links.msnw" target="_blank">Doug</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is] one of the most exciting sites on the internet!&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Discipline-Harmony/message/856" target="_blank">Malcolm</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[T]he whole damn site really is one of the most well articulated (pro/con) loaded blogs I've seen. It provides a cross section of how people are feeling out there even amongst those who are &#8216;seemingly&#8217; natural allies.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/RavNet/message/13" target="_blank">zbigdogX</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;As I view it, I'm a control freak. I love to be in control. However, I fantasize about that control being stripped from me and handed over to someone else....namely, my husband. I'm just glad I found a site that makes me realize I'm not a freak for wanting to be dominated&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://www.gypsygirl.net/gypsygirl-archives/000580.html" target="_blank">GypsyGirl</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;I was delighted to receive word of <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>. ... a very thoughtful and well-written group blog. ... I'm looking forward to reading through this blog the way I look forward to reading a new novel by a favorite author. It looks that good.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://www.spankingblog.com/arc20031001.htm#BlogID1336" target="_blank">SpankBoss</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;Wow. This site is so amazing.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://suburbansexblog.blogspot.com/2004_03_01_suburbansexblog_archive.html#108076909396883405" target="_blank">Ken</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;&#8220;[<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is] a wonderful website ... from a MaleDom/femsub perspective ... [I]t's about the interpersonal dynamics of loving relationships where the man is the boss. [I]t's assumed that both partners are in it because that's what they want and have chosen. Also, unlike many other &#8216;traditional marriage&#8217; sites, it's not coming from any sort of biblical perspective. ... Some of the best writing I've seen on these topics, from a variety of authors.&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/TraditionalDs/message/2990" target="_blank">Dee</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;[<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> is] a brill resource.... for info articles... and real life experiences&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://www.britishspanking.com/forums/showpost.php?p=360157&#038;postcount=13" target="_blank">Spirited Angel</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;A very cool site&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://www.greeblie.com/theyeti/arch/012996.html" target="_blank">The Yeti</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;Thank you for providing such a positive, validating place for like-minded people to talk about this in a way that affirms the dignity of both men and women&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Taken_In_Hand/message/19" target="_blank">Mary</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;a great site&#8221;</i><br />
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;- <a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Discipline-Harmony/message/821" target="_blank">Jana Peterson</a></p>
<p><i>&#8220;an exremely high quality site... I highly recommend [<a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a>].&#8221;</i><br />
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<h2 id="title" class="title">The Virgin and the Gipsy, by D. H. Lawrence</h2>
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<div class="content"><p>One night when I was a child of about eleven years old, I crept downstairs in the late night darkness to find out what my parents were watching on television. Standing in the unlit hall by the door next to the stairs, I peered at the television through the crack between the door and the doorframe, and watched, mesmerised and dry-mouthed, heart pounding in fear that my parents might discover me. </p>
<p>It was not long before I was aching from standing half on the stairs and holding my head at an unnatural angle, but I could not tear myself away. Eventually, it became altogether too steamy for me and I quietly went up to bed, my cheeks burning.</p>
<p>What was it I had watched? I had to know! I needed to know. Luckily, where I lived at the time, we only had a few television channels, so the next morning, with the help of the previous night's TV listings, I was able to determine that what my parents had been watching was a film adaptation of D.H. Lawrence's short novel, <cite><A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0679740775/takeninhand01-20" target="_blank">The Virgin and the Gipsy</a></cite>. At least, I was pretty sure it wasn't the listed Open University programme on statistical mechanics or the sports roundup. </p>
<p>The following Saturday, I went to a local bookshop and bought a copy of <cite><A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0679740775/takeninhand01-20" target="_blank">The Virgin and the Gipsy</a></cite>, took it to my room, and read it from cover to cover without stopping. Then I read it again. The power of D.H. Lawrence's prose pulled me in and gripped me intensely. I was the virgin, Yvette. I felt her inner strength, her disgust, her desire; I identified with her attraction to psychological power and strength, and with her rejection of her father's harsh and cruel &#8220;rectory morality&#8221;. I admired her ability to keep her inner life private from those to whom she did not care to reveal herself.</p>
<p>Evidently this short, sharp, exquisite novel does not speak to everyone. Some readers seem to find it boring and annoying. Many readers discussing the book on <a href="http://www.constantreader.com/discussions/virginandthegypsy.htm" target="_blank">this page</a> seem to me to have missed the very soul of the book. In fact, it was because I stumbled upon that discussion that I re-read the book, interested to know whether it would still speak to me. It does. It is taut with masochistic intensity. Perhaps you have to have a touch of psychological sadomasochism in you to appreciate <cite><A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0679740775/takeninhand01-20" target="_blank">The Virgin and the Gipsy</a></cite>. What I mean by this is that Yvette lives with and survives what Lyn Cowan <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0882143670/takeninhand01-20" target="_blank">calls</a> &#8220;oppositional extremity&#8221;:</p>
<blockquote><p>Masochism is an art of holding oneself in oppositional extremity. The masochist sees himself living &#8211; appears to live &#8211; <i>in extremis</i>, at the very edge of danger, madness, death.  . . . Often opposite feelings like pride and humiliation are present simultaneously, both torturous, both pleasurable.  . . . There is pride in this cliff-hanging extremity, in maintaining these impossible oppositions without plunging over the edge. It is an extreme pride, a pride of extremity, of going to extremes and surviving.</p></blockquote>
<p>Here are a few quotes from <cite><A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0679740775/takeninhand01-20" target="_blank">The Virgin and the Gipsy</a></cite> to give you a taste of its atmosphere. But if you haven't read it, why not read the <a href="http://etext.library.adelaide.edu.au/l/lawrence/dh/virgin/virgin.html" target="_blank">whole thing</a> instead?</p>
<blockquote><p>[The gipsy] looked at Yvette as he passed, staring her full in the eyes, with his pariah’s bold yet dishonest stare. Something hard inside her met his stare. But the surface of her body seemed to turn to water. Nevertheless, something hard in her registered the peculiar pure lines of his face, of his straight, pure nose, of his cheeks and temples. The curious dark, suave purity of all his body, outlined in the green jersey: a purity like a living sneer.</p>
<p>And as he loped slowly past her, on his flexible hips, it seemed to her still that he was stronger than she was. Of all the men she had ever seen, this one was the only one who was stronger than she was, in her own kind of strength, her own kind of understanding.</p>
<p>[...]</p>
<p>Yvette felt there was some duplicity somewhere. But she didn’t mind. She hated with the cold, acrid hatred of a child the rectory interior, the sort of putridity in the life. She liked that big, swarthy, wolf-like gipsy-woman, with the big gold rings in her ears, the pink scarf over her wavy black hair, the tight bodice of brown velvet, the green, fan-like skirt. She liked her dusky, strong, relentless hands, that had pressed so firm, like wolf’s paws, in Yvette’s own soft palm. She liked her. She liked the danger and the covert fearlessness of her. She liked her covert, unyielding sex, that was immoral, but with a hard, defiant pride of its own. Nothing would ever get that woman under. She would despise the rectory and the rectory morality, utterly! She would strangle Granny with one hand. And she would have the same contempt for Daddy and for Uncle Fred, as men, as she would have for fat old slobbery Rover, the Newfoundland dog. A great, sardonic female contempt, for such domesticated dogs, calling themselves men.</p>
<p>And the gipsy man himself! Yvette quivered suddenly, as if she had seen his big, bold eyes upon her, with the naked insinuation of desire in them. The absolutely naked insinuation of desire made her life prone and powerless in the bed, as if a drug had cast her in a new molten mould.</p>
<p>[...]</p>
<p>The gipsy stood at the back door, under the steep dark bank where the larches grew. The long brooms flourished from one hand, and from the other hung various objects of shining copper and brass: a saucepan, a candlestick, plates of beaten copper. The man himself was neat and dapper, almost rakish, in his dark green cap and double-breasted green check coat. But his manner was subdued, very quiet: and at the same time proud, with a touch of condescension and aloofness.</p>
<p>&#8220;Anything today, lady?&#8221; he said, looking at Aunt Cissie with dark, shrewd, searching eyes, but putting a very quiet tenderness into his voice.</p>
<p>Aunt Cissie saw how handsome he was, saw the flexible curve of his lips under the line of black moustache, and she was fluttered. The merest hint of roughness or aggression on the man’s part would have made her shut the door contemptuously in his face. But he managed to insinuate such a subtle suggestion of submission into his male bearing, that she began to hesitate.</p>
<p>&#8220;The candlestick is lovely!&#8221; said Yvette. &#8220;Did you make it?&#8221;</p>
<p>And she looked up at the man with her na&iuml;ve, childlike eyes, that were as capable of double meanings as his own.</p>
<p>&#8220;Yes lady!&#8221; He looked back into her eyes for a second, with that naked suggestion of desire which acted on her like a spell, and robbed her of her will. Her tender face seemed to go into a sleep.</p>
<p>&#8220;It’s awfully nice!&#8221; she murmured vaguely.</p>
<p>Aunt Cissie began to bargain for the candlestick: which was a low, thick stem of copper, rising from a double bowl. With patient aloofness the man attended to her, without ever looking at Yvette, who leaned against the doorway and watched in a muse.</p>
<p>&#8220;How is your wife?&#8221; she asked him suddenly, when Aunt Cissie had gone indoors to show the candlestick to the rector, and ask him if he thought it was worth it.</p>
<p>The man looked fully at Yvette, and a scarcely discernible smile curled his lips. His eyes did not smile: the insinuation in them only hardened to a glare.</p>
<p>&#8220;She’s all right. When are you coming that way again?&#8221; he murmured, in a low, caressive, intimate voice.</p>
<p>&#8220;Oh, I don't know,&#8221; said Yvette vaguely.</p>
<p>&#8220;You come Fridays, when I’m there,&#8221; he said. Yvette gazed over his shoulder as if she had not heard him. Aunt Cissie returned, with the candlestick and the money to pay for it. Yvette turned nonchalant away, trilling one of her broken tunes, abandoning the whole affair with a certain rudeness.</p>
<p>Nevertheless, hiding this time at the landing window, she stood to watch the man go. What she wanted to know, was whether he really had any power over her. She did not intend him to see her this time.</p>
<p>She saw him go down to the gate, with his brooms and pans, and out to the cart. He carefully stowed away his pans and his brooms, and fixed down the tarpaulin over the cart. Then with a slow, effortless spring of his flexible loins, he was on the cart again, and touching the horse with the reins. The roan horse was away at once, the cart-wheels grinding uphill, and soon the man was gone, without looking round. Gone like a dream which was only a dream, yet which she could not shake off.</p>
<p>&#8220;No, he hasn’t any power over me!&#8221; she said to herself: rather disappointed really, because she wanted somebody, or something to have power over her.</p></blockquote>
<p><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/taxonomy/term/16">the&nbsp;boss</a></p>
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<h3 class="title"><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/the.virgin.and.the.gipsy.by.d.h.lawrence#comment-4952" title="Link to this comment." class="active">Flexible loins</a></h3>

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<p>Those are wonderful extracts - now I know where Stella Gibbons got Seth Starkadder from - he's the gypsy to the life, flexible loins and all! .... "He came over to her with the lounging grace of a panther, and leaned against the mantlepiece.  Flora saw at once that he was not the kind who could be fobbed off with offers of tea.  She was for it." - Cold Comfort Farm</p>

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<div class="links">by <a href="user/764" title="View user profile.">Louise C</a> on 2005 Apr 24 - 16:04 | <a href="user/login">login</a> or <a href="user/register">register</a> to post comments</div>

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<h3 class="title"><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/the.virgin.and.the.gipsy.by.d.h.lawrence#comment-4953" title="Link to this comment." class="active">My interest is piqued</a></h3>

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<p>I am an avid reader and this has definitely piqued my interest. I will definitely read this. Thank you, the&#160;boss.</p>

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<div class="links">by <a href="user/1582" title="View user profile.">Lil Red</a> on 2005 Apr 24 - 17:07 | <a href="user/login">login</a> or <a href="user/register">register</a> to post comments</div>

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<h3 class="title"><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/the.virgin.and.the.gipsy.by.d.h.lawrence#comment-4957" title="Link to this comment." class="active">Sadomasochistic?</a></h3>

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<p>Sadomasochistic? I never saw any sadomasochism in the Virgin and the Gypsy book. Where do you get that idea?</p>

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<div class="links">by a Taken In Hand reader on 2005 Apr 25 - 07:15 | <a href="user/login">login</a> or <a href="user/register">register</a> to post comments</div>

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<h3 class="title"><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/the.virgin.and.the.gipsy.by.d.h.lawrence#comment-4961" title="Link to this comment." class="active">A Portrait Of A Dysfunctional Family</a></h3>

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<p>The background of the family is a classic study of emotional abuse
by a sadistically domineering matriarch. The whole family seems to be
made up of psychological basket cases. Yvette seems to be the only
member of the family to have any clue to what will make her happy. My
impression is that one probably does have to have masochistic
tendencies to be able to understand what she does about herself.

<p>KrosRogue
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<div class="links">by <a href="user/325" title="View user profile.">KrosRogue</a> on 2005 Apr 25 - 10:23 | <a href="user/login">login</a> or <a href="user/register">register</a> to post comments</div>

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<h3 class="title"><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/the.virgin.and.the.gipsy.by.d.h.lawrence#comment-4962" title="Link to this comment." class="active">Open to Interpretation</a></h3>

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<p>Much like a Chinese box, the&#160;boss's reading of the Virgin and the Gipsy seems to represent a discovery within discovery.  Reading about a teenager discovering herself becomes a discovery for another girl half a century later.  Then, that is the nature of literature as a means of vicarious discovery.  Reading a book can change the life of an individual.</p>
<p>Although admittedly no fan of novels - or D. H. Lawrence for that matter - I am aware that the genre does have its admirers.  Then, I have found life more interesting lived than read about from someone else's imaginary point of view.</p>
<p>Nevertheless, Lawrence paints a vivid literary image of a deeply conflicted young woman standing before a virile male presence.  The author sets the stage in the first sentence of the novel by denying the heroine of his story both the supervision of a father able to handle a woman - who wife left him for a pauper - as well as the guidance of a mother given to respecting her husband.  It perhaps contributes to Yvette being bored by men attracted to her - like Leo, whom she sees a fit only to be engaged to her silk underwear -  and propels her on a search for a man able to handle her.</p>
<p>Perhaps because Gipsy is unpolished - written only a few years before Lawrence fragile health (which rendered him unfit for the Great War obliquely referred to in the novel) - the sparse wording leaves much to the imagination of the reader.  Hence, because of Lawrence's ambiguity, Yvette's inner feelings are open to interpretation.  Thus, a masochistic explanation is possible above a sophomoric elucidation of the character.</p>

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<div class="links">by <a href="user/23" title="View user profile.">Noone</a> on 2005 Apr 25 - 12:12 | <a href="user/login">login</a> or <a href="user/register">register</a> to post comments</div>

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<h3 class="title"><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/the.virgin.and.the.gipsy.by.d.h.lawrence#comment-4975" title="Link to this comment." class="active">Admirers of the novel</a></h3>

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<p>You're right - the genre does indeed have its admirers! I'm coming out now, as one of them. I haven't read the V and the G, but those extracts make me recall Sons and Lovers, and how much I wanted to be the male "stranger" who took Miriam up against the tree. She was an interesting woman: deep, demanding and dangerous in the way she wanted to absorb masculine energy. A typical <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> woman? </p>
<p>Thanks for giving <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> a literary aspect, the&#160;boss.</p>

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<div class="links">by <a href="user/1517" title="View user profile.">Carl</a> on 2005 Apr 26 - 22:50 | <a href="user/login">login</a> or <a href="user/register">register</a> to post comments</div>

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<h3 class="title"><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/the.virgin.and.the.gipsy.by.d.h.lawrence#comment-4981" title="Link to this comment." class="active">Re: Sadomasochistic?</a></h3>

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<p>My apologies, but I will not have time to answer this for at least a week. I do hope to get to it eventually though. Unless someone else would like too explain or speculate in my absence?</p>

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<div class="links">by <a href="user/48" title="View user profile.">the boss</a> on 2005 Apr 27 - 06:20 | <a href="user/login">login</a> or <a href="user/register">register</a> to post comments</div>

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<h3 class="title"><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/the.virgin.and.the.gipsy.by.d.h.lawrence#comment-5790" title="Link to this comment." class="active">Deep, demanding and dangerous woman wanting to absorb masculine</a></h3>

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<blockquote><p>I haven't read the V and the G, but those extracts make me recall Sons and Lovers, and how much I wanted to be the male "stranger" who took Miriam up against the tree. She was an interesting woman: deep, demanding and dangerous in the way she wanted to absorb masculine energy. A typical <a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/" class="site">Taken In Hand</a> woman?</p></blockquote>
<p>I say! I must re-read <cite><A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1593080131/takeninhand01-20" target="_blank">Sons and Lovers</a></cite>, evidently. Perhaps I was too young to appreciate it when I read it as a teenager... I remember being disappointed in it after reading <cite><A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0679740775/takeninhand01-20" target="_blank">The Virgin and the Gipsy</a></cite> and <cite><A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0140188169/takeninhand01-20" target="_blank">Women In Love</a></cite>.</p>

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<div class="links">by <a href="user/48" title="View user profile.">the boss</a> on 2005 Jun 15 - 23:51 | <a href="user/login">login</a> or <a href="user/register">register</a> to post comments</div>

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<h3 class="title"><a href="http://www.takeninhand.com/the.virgin.and.the.gipsy.by.d.h.lawrence#comment-15559" title="Link to this comment." class="active">My favorite book</a></h3>

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<p>I just found your site, having had an epiphany in my mid-50s that I want to be under a man's control.  Wow, what memories this article brings up.  I read The Virgin and the Gypsy multiple times when I was in my early adolescence and it thrilled me.  By mid-adolescence I avoided assertive, strong men and that was my pattern for 40 years.</p>

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