If there is no other option, you could move this site over to taken in hand at yahoo groups. Files, links and articles can be moved. You don't have the hassel or expense of running a server. I would hate to see this site to cease to exist.

Vicki..

As I recall, when I first encountered this site, I inquired about how to make donations, because I did not see any link to do that. I would think that would be the first obvious thing to try. It's pretty safe and easy to set that up via PayPal. You might also expand the personal ads section, and charge people some reasonable fee for every month the ad remains up.

Or you could set some of the archives apart as a "members only" section, to encourage people to pay to join. It sounds like maybe you're averse to asking people to contribute to supporting this site, but I don't think there's any need to be shy about that. It's a wonderful resource that means a lot to many people, and I think you would find a lot of people eager and willing to donate to keep it alive.

I would hate for it to disappear, or to be absorbed into the Yahoo group. I often mention this site on other discussion forums and post links to it. That would not work for the Yahoo group, because it's membership only, and few people will join up if they're not already into it. If you're really interested in getting this idea out to the world, then that means there needs to be some portion of the website that remains readily available to anyone who clicks on a link. But you can ask for donations, or set some portion of the material aside for paying members. Good luck!

One possibility is to create a mirror site. This would reduce the hits on one server.

Another option would be the move to a commercial host with tons of gawky popup ads.

What size is your web space, and what is your monthly transfer volume?

Have you tried using a hosting service like 1and1.com?

What would be your annual operating costs?

Instead of keeping track of subscriptions, have you considered putting something like a Paypal donation button on your site?

Maybe you can set up a donate button so those who feel willing can donate thus avoiding a mandatory fee. It may not bring in a lot but maybe enough to take some of the financial load off you.

Are PayPal accounts easy to obtain where you are? Unless the funds that you need to keep going are staggering, you might be surprised how much you receive when you simply ask for donations. I'd be more than willing to chip in first with a gift of US$25.

I have run a search for the lowest cost hosting solution in Denmark. There is something called clichehosting.com who offer a GAMMA-Suite at 50pence pr month which I believe will match your requirements regarding speed, space and database support.

They have a UK office and I would be surprised if they dont provide e-mail support in english.

Please note that I dont have any practical experience with them.

Best regards,
UnshackledAlpha

www.holdouts.com is a website that focuses on online gaming. They rent out game servers to those who want their own private game server to play on. What isn't as well advertised is the fact that they offer a web hosting service for $10 a month ($100 a year if you pay in advance).

This is for unlimited bandwidth. The site gets the majority of their revenue from the game servers - which also represents most of their network traffic. By comparison, hosting websites are a drop in the bucket to them in both cost and bandwidth, which is why they can offer such cheap webhosting.

The servers are all Linux, and Apache and MySQL are included in the webhosting service. I've read that Drupal will run on a Linux server using Apache.

While there are no stated limits as to how much disk space is available for a website, you may wish to discuss your disk space needs with them before purchasing their service. Despite the magnitude of their service, they're really just a two man operation. If you offered to send them an 80Gig HD to use for your page, they may accommodate you.

Their website is almost never down, and the available bandwidth is very good (of course it has to be, or they couldn't make money renting game servers).

As far as what they would think of this website I can't know for sure. Taken in Hand doesn't have any questionable images, so wouldn't think Holdouts would have an issue with hosting the site - but I can't promise that.

There is one problem: I am told that Paypal has a habit of suddenly deleting people's accounts without warning, and stealing their money, if they deem the site a sex site, even if it isn't at all, so I am wary about using Paypal at all.

You can set up a personal account with PayPal, keeping it entirely separate from Taken in Hand. By using this account, readers can send you money just as they might send it to their other friends. You would not be acting as a merchant (nor would you be subject to whatever policies prompted the dire warnings you've been given). (PayPal limits the amount of money you can receive as a personal account user to US$500 per month.)

Incidentally, PayPal is owned by eBay, and I'm certain that like most large companies with global ambition, they adhere to the minimal ethical standards necessary to preserve their reputation. So while I can't speak to the way that they manage their customer accounts, I'm certain that they can't "steal" anyone's money. Read the terms and policies that apply to your country. In any case, PayPal doesn't need to know about your connection to Taken in Hand.

What is all this about paying being against the spirit of the internet? why shouldn't people pay for something they really like. You pay for books, newspapers etc if you want to read them, so why not Internet sites?

I first discovered the Internet four years ago after a favourite local bookshop of mine moved to Scotland, and I was lamenting to my husband that I could no longer buy all the American imports they used to stock. "Have you tried looking at amazon?" he asked me. "What's amazon?" I asked him. so he explained about Amazon. I was astounded. "You mean" I breathed, scarcely able to believe my ears "you mean you can SHOP on the computer?" I gazed at the computer as if I had never seen it before (as indeed I hadn't really, at least I'd never paid any attention to it before).

My husband admitted, warily, that yes you could shop on the Internet. He opened an email account for me and showed me how to get onto amazon. And from there on I was hooked. I discovered the fearful delights of shopping on amazon, who lure you deeper and deeper in with every item you look at with enticing offers of more and more books. Eventually, via a book on spanking I bought from them, I discovered my first 'mucky website' as my husband invariably calls them, Shadowlane, which you have to pay to read. I paid. And eventually, meandering about on the Internet, I stumbled on this site. I was happy to read it for free, but I would probably have paid to read it if I'd had to.

For me, the Internet has always been primarily about spending money anyway, amazon, Alibris, ebay(oh boy, when I discovered ebay!)etc, so why not spend some money on Taken In Hand?

Or if you are reluctant to charge membership, then take advertising, pop-up or otherwise. Who cares so long as it keeps the site going?

Louise

I have had my Paypal account for the online side of my business for 4 years, and not one time have I had a problem with Paypal, also, you would be shocked at the percentage of folks who have internet actually have a Paypal account. I, personaly, will only shop online with paypal because they guarentee the purchase. Setting it up is a breeze too! I, too, would contribute to saving Taken In Hand.

You should take a look at http://sdf.lonestar.org/.
MySQL is an option, it is fairly priced and the guy running it has been doing a pretty good job for almost 20 years.

I would really hate to see this site die as it has become a major, almost the only, resource on Taken In Hand.

Cheers,

K

This site is needed! There's got to be a way. I am an IT professional in the UK, here are my ideas:

1) Immediately start an intensive donations campaign using both light graphics and text to explain the reasons why it is necessary.

2) Paypal is ONE option for recieving donations, but there are other ways of recieving donations. Just google Paypal alternatives.

3) Use Dreamhost for hosting. It is cheap to start with, and it lets you put a prominent button to encourage your readers to contribute towards the hosting costs. The money goes straight towards your balance at Dreamhost. It's a bit like putting a branded charity donations cup in a shop.

4) Start accepting Ads. You'll be laughing all the way to the bank.

5) Migrate to a different style, template and graphics (not for the purpose of explicit pictures, just to have more of a theme to the site.. Go full out and accept the popularity of the site by adapting a more modern look, avatars, an incorporated forum etc.

6) For many of these things you need technical help. I can't be the only techie here, there's got to be plenty! Ask them to step forward and come up with a plan.

Please feel free to email me at the email that I gave. I can tell you have to get started on all of the things that I suggested. I am an IT Project manager with technical skills and may be able to help you.

The Amazon solution of giving the readers an opportunity to make voluntary contribututions would seem to be a perfect solution. Here's a link to an explanation of how it works:

I would hate to see this site turned into another yahoo group. I find them to become unused and over run with trolls and bots and just seen many great sites like this one turn into junk. This is a unique group of people and friends and I would love to see it stay this way. I will send you a person email and maybe come up with something.

Amanda

What about GoDaddy.com. They host websites for myself and my wife. Their pricing is very low and I believe they can meet your bandwidth requirements.

QMCO5

At 2 to 3 megabits, that would equate to 700GB to 900GB a month. Thats alot for any shared hosting option. I could offer a dedicated server and bandwidth for that amount. It would be a shame to see this site go the way of yahoo groups or the like.

I love this site and find a lot of comfort and help from it. I personally would subscribe to membership to keep it going. Please continue to help woman like myself.

Georgi

I've been away for a while, and coming back to the site am shocked and worried to see this! The site must not go - you've started something amazing that simply must survive. I know there are lots of ideas here, but here are mine.

I think one of the best things you can do is ask for donations. As you can see, lots of people would give; I would, too. Just let us know where to send money to the hosting fund. I'd also be happy to pay for membership. After all, I've paid enough money to useless kinky dating sites, and this site is much more valuable. Alternatively, I'd be happy to pay for my personal ad, as someone here suggested.

I know you're not mad keen on personals, but I've always thought that was a shame, and making more of them in return for payment could be a good way of supporting the site as well as helping the global community of frustrated single wannabe Taken-in-Handers. If you'd rather not have personals on this site, why not create a separate Taken in Hand personals site, that could cross-subsidise this one? I'd be your first member.

I don't think advertising is a brilliant idea, unless you can link up with some amazingly targeted firm. Those Google ads aren't classy enough for this site, and lots of the firms that would want to be advertised here would be kinky suppliers. While a lot of them are respectable and good, I don't think you'd want their ads to give the site a more BDSM feel.

It would be a big loss, if this site were no more.
I got a lot to think about here. Lot to think about me, how I lived my role as the man in my former relationships.

Have no idea where to host it. But if it needs some donations for the hosting, I would be happy to pay them together with the other people here (but not paypal, heard the same). That wouldn't change it into a paysite, which I abhor, too. We didn't invented the "Net" for moneymakers, that's right.
So it wouldn't necessary to close the site for not paying visitors.

Even with voluntary donations, you wouldn't lose the control over this site, Editor.
It only would show the spirit of the community round takeninhand.com.

And I second Carl's idea of paid personal ads (same decent style as in the existing ads). At first it brings in money. Second, I too can't find a decent place for a personal ad. :-(
Erwin

"What is done is done for better, My Dear"

What is all this squeamishness about making money out of the Internet? My main reason for going on the Internet in the first place was to shop, and people on the net have been making money out of me ever since. I would probably never have gone on it at all otherwise. Voluntary donations, compulsory membership, adverts, personals, I really don't care so long as the site stays open.

Louise

One reason why it may be better to keep Taken In Hand as a free site is that it takes a bit of reading to discover how different this site is from superficially similar ones. Any type of fee notice would make it less inviting, induce a cost-benefit analysis, and could cause new visitors and potential supporters to move on before they understood the value of your site.

In its present form, it generates goodwill that would translate into willing donations, as the comments that you have received show.

But you could charge for value-added aspects of Taken In Hand.

For example, having educated and inspired many, helping them to find each other is an income opportunity for you. But instead of ordinary personal ads (which have inherent problems), you could offer a sophisticated matching service similar to eHarmony.

You are well qualified to design and manage an online psychological questionnaire and analysis (which can be done with a database or spreadsheet program) that could match subtle Taken In Hand needs and qualities. And communication and security packages for online dating services have become commodities.

This would be one way to grow a low-overhead but high-quality business, at your own pace.

And, if you should ever decide to offer Taken In Hand related merchandise, it is relatively simple to set up an online store using a commercial service such as www.dxstorm.com (this is just an example, I don’t have personal knowledge about this particular service). And such a service should also be able to process donations.

And once you finish your book, you may want to consider a publisher such as www.arimapublishing.co.uk/arima400.htm, which is author friendly (authors retain full rights and receive premium royalties) and whose global distribution channels include Amazon.com and Amazon.co.uk.

How is your book coming along? You have a ready readership, and I am sure that many of us would be happy to place a pre-publication order.