Rated: AA(under 14). But it doesn't matter though, 'cause I'm under 14.
There is some cursing.
Note:Since this is a sequel, I strongly recommend you read A New Life first, although you
will sort of understand what happened if you don't. Oh, and it happens after the
ending and before the epilogue (so if you read the story, you know the end
of this already- which is only so good 'cause Croatia beat Germany 3-0).
And as for the title,I came up with that while watching the World Cup game - Yugoslavia vs.
Holland. I think one of the announcers said something like that, so I just
thought I'd give proper credit ( but, it might've been on a commercial or a
fanfic I read afterwards, I'm not sure). (I also came up with the plot line
right after, so if you think it's too much of a downer, don't flame me,
blame the stupid Dutch player who got that goal in at the last minute of
the game! I was bitter, that's all I can say.)
Disclaimer: You know the drill. Buffy and everyone are owned by Joss Weedon
and Mutant Enemy and some other rich guys at WB, and I'm not making any
money out of this. But Sarah, Alex and Will are mine!
I become aware of my surroundings again a full 15 minutes later. I'm out of breath, but Angel's fine, although far from calm. I look around at my friends and blush. They're sitting on the floor, staring.
''Finally!''- Xander says, getting up.- '' You ok., Buffy?''
'' Why wouldn't I be?''- I ask, frowning slightly.
''Well, considering the fact that I haven't seen you in three months it just seemed like a nice thing to say.''- he explains. I nod. That's pure Xander ; overprotective to the core. Alex speaks up.
''So, um, let me get this straight. Vampires exist. You're supposed to fight them. That guy's vamp, and you're dating him?''
''Basically.''- I answer.- ''So, when does our flight leave?''
###
I sit on the plane, beside Angel. He seems strangely quiet, but I have to talk to Willow, so I get up and walk to her seat. She has cut her red hair in a layered bob and it looks good on her. Somehow very fitting.
''Well, well, well, Miss. Rosenberg. You succeeded in bringing a vampire back from hell. However did you manage it?''- I ask, laughing. I'm in an unusually goofy mood, but the question is serious.
''I didn't.''- she answers, and gestures to Xander.- ''He did.''
I frown, confused. Why would Xander bring Angel back? The last I checked, he hated him. But, I realize, time changes people. Looks like Xander just changed for the better, but it still doesn't explain one thing.
''But, Will, it must've been a pretty complicated ritual. Xander doesn't have that kind of knowledge, I mean, I thought he swore to stay away from spells?''- I ask. Willow shrugs, like she has no idea either.
''I asked him why.''- she tells me.- ''He said he had to make up for it.''
''Make up for what?''- I ask, growing ever more confused. Then it hits me. < Willow said... - he had paused there, like he was making up his mind.- kick his ass. > Willow restored Angel's soul. Xander was supposed to tell me. He didn't. God, it's so painfully clear! Why didn't I figure it out before? Then I realize it. Xander wanted Angel dead. It could've been Xander's fault Angel got sucked into hell... That bastard wanted to kill him! I'm so incredibly mad, I guess it shows of my face. Willow has a doubting, scared look I haven't seen on her in a long time.
'' Buffy, please don't. I promised I wouldn't tell. Not now, please, Buffy. He made up for it.''- Willow asks. I suppose I have to listen to her, after all, it was on my account she almost got killed. All of them could've gotten killed on my account. At least I owe her that much.
''All right. Fine.''- I say, and walk back to my seat and the safety of Angel's arms.
We land in Sunnydale fifteen minutes later. It's almost morning, and after saying good-bye I walk home quickly. Angel comes with me, and we reach my house a few minutes before the first purple and gold streaks appear on the night sky. He talks about regular stuff, but he avoids our last confrontation and everything that happened before it. I don't bring it up, but I do ask about my mother.
''Uh, Buffy, there's something you should know.''- he says as soon as we enter my house. He's got that guilty, almost brooding expression in his dark eyes, and I wonder if he is going to finally bring it up.
'' Your mom, and Giles, they've, uh, well, gotten together.''- Angel says quickly. It takes me moment to finally register the fact that my mom knows about my slaying. I think about it for a minute. My mom's been lonely, and ever since Miss. Calender died, Giles had been, well, I can't explain it. Sort of depressed, but it's like he tried his best not to let it show. I suppose they'll be good for each other. I smile, and look up at him.
''That's good.''- I say. Just at that moment, my mom comes in the room. She looks exactly like when I last saw her, except now she has dark circles around her eyes, and her face looks tired. But, as soon as she sees me, it lights up.
''Buffy!''- she cries, and before I have time to react, she's hugging me. I hug her back.
''I'm sorry.''- she says, and she's sincere. I smile through my tears of joy.
'' I'm sorry too.''- I say.- '' So, you know about everything? About...''- I trail off here. I want to see just how much Giles told her.
'' Rupert told me everything. About Angel, and his soul, and about what you had to do. He figured it out.''- she adds quickly after I give her a confused look. < How? > I don't ask that, however.
'' I just want to say, after I found out how hard it was for you, I've never been more glad to be your mother.''- she says. I smile, because I haven't been on this good terms with her in months.
'' You're embarrassing me.''- I say, laughing, but actually I'm glad. Angel's looking uncomfortable in the darkest corner of the room. I realize that he's about to get burned, and I hurry towards him. I close all the blinds, and he looks much more at ease. I flash an apologetic smile.
'' It's okay''- he says, but he doesn't kiss me. Something's wrong, and I'm about to ask what, when mom interrupts me.
'' I know you're wondering about school.'' I groan, and remember the principal and the police arresting me, me calling him a stupid little troll, escaping from the police, and then getting expelled.
'' Well, you don't have to worry. The police have cleared your name, and for some reason, the principal called of the expulsion and cleared you permanent record. Amazing, almost as if witchcraft was at work...''- she says, hinting at what I suspect. Right now, it seems like my life's perfect, and I'm about to think that when I stop myself.
'' Look, why don't you take a shower, and I'll fix you some breakfast and run you to school.''- mom says, and I nod. She disappears. I flash Angel a mischievous smile and tug at his shirt.
''Wanna join me?''- I ask. He just looks uncomfortable, and opens his mouth to speak.
''Look, Buffy, I- I gotta think.''- he says, and disappears into my basement. I figure there's some underground entrance he can use to get away, but the thing that occupies my mind now is worrying. Something is terribly wrong, and I can sense it. I guess I'll just give him some time. After all, he has been through a lot. Dragging my feet, I walk slowly to the bathroom.
@@@
I stand in front of Sunnydale high, wearing a little tank top and tight pants. I haven't dressed this way in a long time, three months. Remembering all that denial, my thoughts turn to Sarah, Alex, and Will. I had pretty much abandoned them, just giving them my number and a few quick good-byes before running off to the airport. I have to call them soon, but now that I'm back in my old life, they seem part of some huge, disturbingly realistic dream.
It's still early in the morning and the only occupants of the school yard are a couple of sports buffs practicing, and a couple of nerds studying. In Sunnydale, school starts earlier then LA, and this is the second week of the school year. I walk right by them, trying to ignore the whispers. Rumors repeated over and over. How I'm a killer, how I threatened principal Snyder into letting me come here... you name them. The door is open, and I walk into the library.
'' So, Giles, hear you've been getting some action with my mom. Any ancient prophecies? We haven't had any in a while.''- I ask cheerfully. It'll be be good to the stuffy British librarian again. But I don't. Instead, I see a middle aged woman in glasses. She'd dressed like she's in the fifties, and has a big smile on her face. I frown, and she explains.-
'' I trust you are looking for Mister Giles? He was called away last night. Are you Willow, Cordelia or Buffy?''- she asks, holding a letter. I tell her my name, and she gives it to me. I read it.
Dear Buffy, Willow, Angel, Xander, Cordelia, and Oz-
First of all, let me just apologize for not coming with the others, Buffy.
I was going to, but I got a letter from an old pal of mine. He's in the
watchers council, and they say they have good news to tell. I didn't tell
this to the rest of you before I left because I knew I'd be faced with
questions. I'll answer some of them. Yes, there is a watcher's council, but
they don't get involved in the slaying game unless somebody already has
taken over the world, so that's why I didn't appeal to them when we were in
such danger. Also, they almost never call watchers to see them, so this is
a really big deal. As soon as I have any news, I'll call.
Sincerely, Rupert Giles, your devoted watcher
The letter looks like it was written in a hurry. I say good bye to the woman, and leave the library.
#####
My day could not have been worse. The endless staring, whispering, criticizing... I am so glad when I finally get home, after dark. I haven't talked with Xander about what he did, and I don't want to. He made up for, it. It's ancient history now. As soon as I enter a see a letter lying there. < Well, today's certainly a letter writing day! > - I think. Doesn't anyone use phones anymore? I pick it up, and open it. I recognize the writing immediately. Angel. This has to be bad news.
Dear Buffy,
I'm sorry. I truly, completely am. I have to leave, there's no question. At first, I thought everything would be all right. The guilt of almost killing all of you and murdering Jenny should've been enough to keep my soul pestering me. You know how the curse works, and when I'm with you, I can't think about anything else. I can't take the chance. I'm sorry. I know you understand. I'm really, very sorry.
Love always, forever, Angel.
I stand there, frozen. Leave me? Angel? No, he can't do this! I start to cry, and smash the kitchen counter with my fist. There's a sickening sound as the wood cracks, and the pain distracts me for a second. He can't do this to me again! But, it's the truth. For the good of humanity. Why the hell does he have to be so goddamn patriotic? Why? Well, fuck him. Fuck the world! The phone interrupts me. Without thinking, I pick it up.
'' Buffy, you will not believe our good luck!''- I hear a cheerful British voice, but all it does is make me angrier. Good luck?! Give me back my Angel and then talk about that shit!
'' Talk to me about good luck when Angel comes back.''- I say hoarsely, and slam the phone hard. I run up to my room, and fling myself on the bed. I cry, and cry, and cry. If he has to leave why the hell did he show himself to me? It would've been so much simpler if I had believed he was dead. Why? I ask myself these unanswerable questions, until a name spoken on the radio catches my attention. - and here we have a dedication from Angel who is leaving Sunnydale by plane very soon, to Buffy. Buffy, he wants you to know that he still loves you, and he's only doing this because he has to. Now, here's My Heart Will Go On, by Celine Dion.-
Every night in my dreams,
I see you, I feel you
That is how I know you go on
Far across the distance
The spaces between us,
You have come to show you go on
< Could he have chosen a cornier song? > -I think. This isn't some crappy, twisted, demonic Dawson's Creek vignette! This is life! My heart won't go on. That only happens in hollywood movies and stupid songs!
Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Bullshit.
Once more you open the door
and you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on.
No, it won't. Shut up, shut up, shut up! I scream at the radio and fling my shoe at it. My eyes are blurred with tears, my head unable to think with emotion. The heel beaks in half, hitting only a fraction of the radio. Now the lyrics are warped and weird, strange. But you can still make them out.
Love can touch us one time
And last for a lifetime
And never let go till we're one
Love was when I loved you
One true time to hold to
In my life we'll always go on
No. < I've tried this before. >- I think. He never even said good-bye! Then it hits me. He said he was at the airport... That must be a hint! And even if it's not, I don't care. Oh, he is going to get a good-bye. I'm the goddamn slayer, he's a fucking vampire. Let's see if I can't do what I was born to do. I take my crossbow, jump off the bed, and fire it in mid air. The stereo explodes. I was so destined to do this.
I run out of the house, my make-up running from all the tears, my hair a mess, but I don't care. As I take mom's car all I care about is making him pay for what I had to suffer through.
######
I'm at the airport now. It's a fairly small one, and the only flight scheduled for today is one for New York. As I'm about to walk down the corridor that leads to a plane, the ticket - person stops me. He is at least a head and a half taller then me, and very built. Still, as he looks at me, his eyes have an expression of fear.
'' Uh, miss., do you have your ticket?''- he stops me from walking any further in. I turn around, ready to beat the crap out of him, when I catch my reflection on the glass walls opposite. I look like hell. Well, actually, that's an understatement. My hair is sticking up and flying all over the place. I have black make-up circles down to my cheeks. I am wearing the tank top, now wrinkled and tear and make-up stained, and my pants are in the same condition. I only have one shoe on, and am clutching a genuine 15-th century crossbow like I can't bear to part with it.
At that moment, I realize the sheer stupidity of what I've done. < Why the hell do I have the crossbow? > - I ask myself, knowing the answer. Because I had grabbed it in a fit of blind rage, wanting to... kill Angel? I realize what a fucking idiot I am. I'd just as soon die. But I have to talk to him. Or scream at him, beat him up if necessary, but I have to make him realize that our hearts won't go on like in cliched songs. The ticket - person is still standing there, shifting from foot to foot.
''Tell ya what. You let me go, and I won't have to fire this through your head.''- I say, as if asking him if he'll take the deal. Of course he will. He just nods, and I walk in. No doubt he's calling security, but I don't care.
Then I see him. Dressed in his usual silk shirt and guilty, brooding expression. I am mad again.
'' Angel.''- I call. He turns around, and is definitely startled by my appearance. He says my name. There are already a few people looking at what's happening.
'' I have to go Buffy. This can't ever work out, you know that. Why did you have to make it harder?''- he asks, not moving. I laugh. A slow, unnecessarily loud, strained, tortured laugh.
'' The million dollar question- why the hell not? ''- I ask, growing serious, although I know why. I don't give him a chance to answer.- ''Because you're scared. That's why Angel. You're terrified, just like you were for a hundred years. Are you going to go back to living like that again?'' He sighs.
'' If that's what it'll take to keep you safe. '' I laugh again, harder this time. The crowd is growing bigger and bigger.
'' Safe? Safe. In case you haven't noticed in your 240- some years, this shitty planet is anything but safe! Especially for me. I'm the Slayer, Angel. It's a demanding job. You're what keeps me sane. You take that away, and what do you have?''- I ask, quoting him. He comes closer.
'' You. The last time we brought this up you did pretty well without me. ''
'' No! That was because I knew Angel still loved me, no matter what Angelus did. In your own sick twisted way, even when you were evil, you still did. The opposite of love isn't hate, Angel. It's indifference. And if your feelings for me are that strong, how can you just leave? You're just cheating yourself, Angel. And me.'' - I say, stepping closer. I look up at him.-
'' Tell me you don't love me.''- I say. He doesn't answer, just looks away.- '' Tell me!''
'' I do, Buffy. I can't lie to you. Maybe to myself, but not to you. That's why I got to leave. Every second with you is pure happiness, as mushy as it sounds, it is. You know how the curse works.'' He says, and starts to walk away. I grab him, and pull him back.
'' Fuck the curse.''- I say, and kiss him. I know I have him now. The crowd applauds, and he pulls away a bit.
''But..''- he trails off, and a put my finger to his lips.
'' Willow will find a cure, the Watcher's council will help, even if I have to make them through violence, but for now...''- I stop, smile, and whisper, like on that night so many months ago.- '' Just kiss me.'' And he does.
#####
'' Buffy!''- I hear Xander and Willow yell. I break the kiss.
'' What are you guys doing here?''- I ask.
'' Are you all right? We heard the thing on the radio, and went to your house, but you weren't there, so we came here and we found out everything is all right and did I just say all that without taking a breath?''- Willow says, out of breath. I smile. I'm fine. Everything's fine.
'' But before that, Giles called. He says that the watcher's council wants to reward us because we've saved the world so many times.''- she explains.
'' So we're getting an all- expense paid trip to Las Vegas!''- Xander jokes. I look at him, not knowing if he's joking or not.
'' Really?''- I say. Willow laughs, and Xander babbles on.
'' No! They're actually all these immortal guys who formed sort of a kill the demons fan club back in god ol' 2000 BC.''- Xander says. Willow interrupts him to tell the story properly.
'' So they thought up the whole Slayer/ Watcher thing, and only once have a slayer and a watcher been called there before...'' I interrupt her.
'' So I have these guys to thank for screwing up my life and then doing absolutely nothing to help?''
'' Buffy, promise you won't do anything rash.''- Willow makes me swear. I nod, not really wanting to make a big issue out of it.
'' Anyway, the last people who thwarted so many prophecies got their fondest wish- and to be immortal!''- Willow exclaims, eyes shining. We all stare at her.
######
We are all standing in front of a gothic mansion somewhere in Europe, waiting for someone to answer the doorbell. Giles said to dress formally, and of course Cordelia jumped at the chance, and even Willow was happy at the opportunity to play princess. The guys weren't so happy, but they obliged. Since the watcher's council is like 4000 years old, Giles said they tend to be a bit old fashioned, so as not to wear anything too modern. They haven't been out in the outside world in a couple of centuries. Well, I didn't listen. I am wearing a tank top and a short skirt, just like I always do. Willow's worried that I'm going to have a big attitude problem, but I assured her that's not going to happen two days ago. She knows me, though. She knows I blame everything in my life that got screwed up because of slaying on these people.
Finally, a stuffy looking person opens the huge door. We come in, and gasp. Even Cordelia, who is used to fancy houses, is a bit taken aback. The ceilings are about four times as high as normal ones, everything is decorated with antique furniture, gold rimmed paintings hang on the walls.... I just seize it all up and say nothing. So this is where they spend their time while I'm hunting demons in cemeteries. The butler ( I suppose he is that ) shows us into an ever bigger room.
There are twelve thrones lined up, and twelve men sit on them. They gesture for us to get down an our knees, while staring at my clothes. Everybody's about to do it ( even Cordelia, although I guess she would do anything for eternal beauty ), when I stop them. The council looks at me even more suprised then they already are.
'' Bow to you? Me, who's saved the world from more bogeymen then any comic- book super hero, while all of you sit here on your big immortal asses? I don't think so.''- I say, and stand up straight. Willow and Xander are exchanging an I-told-you-so look. The're debating what to do in their heads.
'' Do you know what an honor it is to be called here? How many slayers never get their fondest wish fulfilled?''- one of them asks.
'' Well, news flash, Einstein! My fondest wish is that Angel can't lose his soul at all. Well, and possibly every single vamp put to sleep, but that's wishful thinking.''- I say, looking him straight in the eye.
'' Uh, I still get to never get old and wrinkly, right?''- Cordelia asks. The Watcher sighs.
'' Well, we already did all the spells. They're irreversible, and we don't really want to reverse them anyway, because we respect your watcher, Slayer. Although you are very rude, you've done some great things.''
'' So Angel can't lose his soul?''- Willow asks. That had been his request. Mine was that my mom is included, Cordelia's never to gain any weight, Xander's to have all these girls swooning over him ( Although after Valentine's day, I don't know how he dares ), Willow's that Oz is included ( because he wasn't supposed to be ), and Giles' to have Ms. Calender back. They could basically do anything, but only to good people. They couldn't place any spells on the bad guys ( oh, how convenient ).
'' No.''- he says. I turn to Angel and he kisses me. And again. And again.
'' Please, stop that.''- another Watcher says.
'' Shut up!''- both me and Angel yell at him. Willow knows it's over as the head Watcher yells to the butler.-
'' Throw them out of here.'' I give him a Look.
'' We can go out ourselves. Any more time looking at your ugly face and I would've barfed.''- And with that we all walk outside, where Giles is waiting for us. He turns around.
'' I can't believe you did that! Buffy, what possessed you to do that?''- he asks. I look at him.-
'' Giles, I blame everything on those people. From Angel getting sucked into hell to breaking a nail last night fighting a vamp. You're just lucky I didn't rip their throats out!''- I say, sitting on the huge, carved, stone steps. Everybody follows.
'' So what do we do now that we're immortal?''- Willow asks.- '' Oh, yeah, we still got to fly to Sunnydale and tell Buffy's mom and Oz.''
'' Well, I say we go and pig out! Be witty and make fun of all our poor mortal friends!''- Xander voices his opinion.
'' I still can't believe you did that! This will be in all the history books. I'm so humiliated.''- Giles is still on the self pity trip.
'' I know what I'm going to do!''- I say, grab Angel, and run to the car. I hear Xander in the background.-
'' I hate you, dead boy!''
I suppose the more things change, the more they stay the same.
The End
Send feedback