disclaimer in part 1
It took them the better part of twenty minutes, and as they went on Buffy noticed Spike seemed quite drained. Apparently the spell took a LOT out of you as it went along.
A thought struck her. How could injured, exhausted Willow have finished it? If Spike, a vampire even if a tired one, was having trouble, it would have been physically impossible for Will.
Spike hesitated for a moment and whispered, "This needs to be said in Romanian. I can't speak Rom --" He stiffened and suddenly began speaking the language like he was born to it. His eyes moved about wildly, but his mouth kept speaking. Though startled, Buffy and Xander kept doing their parts.
By the end of it, Xander and Buffy had nothing to do but stand around and concentrate as Spike said over Drusilla's prone form, "Asa sa fie! Asa sa fie! Acum! Acum! Acum!" Then he shuddered again and a glow left the orb. Spike swore. "WHAT the bloody hell just happened to me?" Then he broke off as Drusilla groaned and woke up. He knelt down by his love's side.
"Mummy, I just had the STRANGEST dream --" she began. Looking around wildly, she screamed, "You're not mummy! Who are you people? Where am I?" She calmed down a bit, and in a slightly more mature voice, said, "This isn't the convent either. The last thing I remember, I was taking holy orders . . ."
Spike looked up at Buffy as the one with experience. After glaring at Xander, who had the grace to turn away with a guilty expression on his face, she said in a a voice completely drained of emotion. "It seems to take a few minutes. Just wait."
Drusilla got up and paced the room. "I was the devil child. He called me the devil child, said god wanted me to be evil. And -- I was! I've killed people, and drained their blood -- and God forgive me, I still want to! This is wrong, it's wrong --"
"Shh, pet," Spike walked over and put his hands on Drusilla's shoulders. "I'm here now. It's okay. You'll be okay."
She jerked out of his hands and turned to face him. "You were there too! By my side, killing and drinking people's blood -- what was I that I did that?" She knelt down and began to pray. "Forgive me, God, for the sins I have committed. IThe priest told me you wanted me to be evil -- and I was! How could you do this to me?" She began crying. "All I wanted to do was love you. And what I've done -- What I've done!" She fell to the floor and began weeping uncontrollably.
Desperately looking for words of comfort, Spike could find none. Neither could Buffy, who despite her hatred for Drusilla felt very sorry for the poor girl.
From behind them a voice said, hesitantly. "It wasn't your fault, Drusilla." Xander? Then, more firmly, "It wasn't your fault." The she-vampire gazed up at him. Taking a deep breath, he said, "You were a vampire. That means there was -- there IS -- a demon inside you. This demon has had control of your body for the last -- well, for as long as you've been a vampire. Wherever YOU were, your soul, YOU were not responsible. The demon committed all those acts. ALL the people killed, up to -- Kendra -- were killed by the demon. NOT you." Drusilla stood and faced him, eyes wide. "You have NOTHING to ask God to forgive you for. You're innocent."
"Am I?" She said. "I remember all those people --"
"It wasn't you, any more than it was -- than it was . . . Angel . . . ." He shook his head. "Angel didn't kill Ms. Calendar. Angel didn't torture you, Buffy. Angel didn't even kill that gypsy girl, way back when." He was no longer speaking to Drusilla, but to himself.
The Slayer could see the hatred drain from his face. She told him, a hint of tenderness in her voice, "You're right, Xander." Then the tenderness fled. "I wish to HELL you'd come to this realization two weeks ago."
"So do I," he said firmly.
"People!" Spike said. "Could we get back to the point? Which is . . . Dru?"
They all looked at the crazy vampire expectantly. "I don't know, I don't know, I don't know! I think -- I need to spend some time with God and ask him for the answers."
Spike moved in closely. "You're in no shape to do it yourself. Let me protect you."
"You'd do that for me? You're also a demon! A devilchild!"
Looking hurt, Spike said, "No. Not any more. I've already gone through what you have. Let me help you, love."
"You always did protect me, Spike," Drusilla said.
"And I always will, pet." Then his voice turned businesslike as he turned to look at Buffy. He extended a hand. "Well, Slayer, I think we're through. I think it's safe to say your friends are safe. At least from us." Buffy shook his hand and Spike turned to go.
"No," Xander said. "It's not over until Drusilla does one more thing."
Turning to him, Buffy hissed, "Xander, shut up."
"No. I owe you this. THEY owe you this." Spike looked at Xander impatiently. "They need to clear you of Kendra's death. I don't know how, but they need to clear you. You can leave, but I don't want you chased by the cops across the country for an unsolved murder."
Bristling, Spike rose to refuse. But Dru cut him off. "No. Maybe in this way I can make up for some of my crimes. I shall write out a confession to give to the police. And the newspapers, and -- perhaps even your mother and Mr. Giles, so they have proof. Would that do?"
Tentatively ,Buffy asked, "Can you stand to make it detailed?"
"For God's sake, I will." From somewhere they got four sheets of paper and a pen and Drusilla tearfully, painfully wrote out four detailed accounts of what she'd done, only leaving out that she was a vampire at the time.
Spike came over and whispered in Xander's ear, "You're lucky she agreed, mate. If this was hurting her, I'd've killed you." Buffy watched but said nothing.
Then she finished. Buffy made as if to take them, but Spike grabbed her hand before she touched the pages. "Think, Slayer. Last thing you want to do is have YOUR fingerprints on these confessions. We'll mail them out." when Buffy hesitated, Spike sighed and said, "You've trsusted me this far. Trust me now. I promise we'll mail them before we leave town."
Buffy could do nothing but agree. No real farewells were necessary, and she certainly wasn't going to hug them. Nevertheless, she did shake Spike's hand again. "Good luck, Spike."
"You need it more than I do, Slayer. I hope you find what you're looking for."
She whispered, "What I'm looking for I threw into Hell."
There was nothing to be said to that. The two vampires left and Buffy turned to Xander. "Okay," she said. "Go."
"Buffy -- " He moved in and she held out her arms. "No. No hugs, no nothing, and if you tell them you saw me I'll come back here and beat the shit out of you. Got it?" He looked hurt, and this was good. Still, she couldn't let him leave feeling totally abandoned. "I told my mother, Xander, I'm telling you. I'll be back. I promise. I do love you all, but --"
"I understand," he interrupted and turned to walk out of the mansion. A she left he called sadly over his shoulder, "I hope one day you CAN forgive me." He left without hearing an answer.
Buffy wasn't all that sure he deserved one yet.
She picked up her bag, then stopped. One more thing she had to take care of. Spike had never gotten an answer to his question about who'd taken him over, but she knew. She whispered up to the ceiling, "Thank you, Ms. Calendar."
She thought she heard a small voice saying, "You're welcome," but then that could have been just the wind.