Disclaimer: I own none of the characters in this story, except for Nightshade- she's my own wicked creation. Buffy and co belong to Joss Whedon and all the other mean people who sent Angel to hell.
Rating: PG- if you can watch Buffy, you can read this
Content: Lots of slaying, a few 'mushy' places- nothing extreme, mild cussing once.
Spoiler: Becoming part 1 and 2
Summary: Buffy has been gone for a few months, and returns to Sunnydale. Not only does she have to deal with the aftermath of Angel's 'death', but a new powerful vamp is in town.
She stepped off the bus slowly, uncertainly. The sign at the station, "Welcome to Sunnydale," was like water to man dying of thirst and a stab through the heart all at the same time. She felt something rising in her chest and her eyes burned. But she wouldn't cry, she refused to cry. She swore the day she left Sunnydale, the day she had killed…nevermind that, she snapped mentally.
Shouldering her two bags, she began walking in the bright afternoon sun. The first place she stopped, although only God knows why, was the high school. They would be seniors this year, she thought. "They moved on, with out me," She whispered to herself unconsciously. Then, "What did you expect when you skipped town? The whole town to freeze over till you came back? Not likely…" Standing there, suddenly, she saw Oz wheel Willow up to Giles and Xander in a wheel chair, followed by Cordelia. They all stood in their small group, probably speculating about the last night…Buffy shook her self out of her thoughts, and looked again. There was nothing there. It was one-thirty in the afternoon; of course there was nothing there. She turned away abruptly, and headed to her house. "Sorry mom," She said to no one, as she hid her bags behind a few bushes. "But I'm going to stash my stuff here for a while." Before she walked away, she saw herself, and Spike and her mom. She her mom yelling at her, wanting explanations. She saw herself, just trying to explain. She heard the words her mother said, telling her if she left, she couldn't come back. She started out of her memories, shook her head, and walked away. She walked without any conscious awareness of where she was going. After a while, she stopped outside an abandoned mansion on Crawford Street, near the edge of town. "This is ridiculous! Why would I come here?" She snapped at herself. But she knew why. Her heart knew. She walked through the empty house, suddenly she heard a cry…
She held the sword, without hesitating she beheaded the first vampire. Then stood with a firm resolve to face Angelus. He made his usually snide, arrogant, cruel comments. "Coming on a little strong, don't you think? Do you really think you can take all of us..?" Then Spike leapt on Angel, as a vamp attacked Buffy from behind. In the back of her mind, she noticed both Xander escaping with Giles and an enraged Drusilla throw herself at Spike. Angelus picked himself up, and reached for the sword…
"No!" She screamed at herself. "Buffy- stop him!! Please make it different!" Then she turned towards Angelus. "Please, you don't know what you're doing..!" He reached out, with the blood on his hand, and pulled the sword out, just as Buffy stood to confront Angel. "You're going to hell," Angel said with a cruel half-smile.
"Save me a seat." The most vicious battle of her entire life ensued. Swords flashing, until Angelus disarmed her and knocked her into a fountain. She backed up against the wall.
"No weapons, no friends…take all that way and what's left?" He drew back to stab the sword through her body.
With lightning quick speed, she caught the flat edge between her palms. "Me." Buffy shoved the sword into his face, and came back. She battled him until he fell back against Acathla. She raised her sword…suddenly Angelus cried out and an orange light flashed in his eyes, she watched him, suspicious.
He looked up with tears in his eyes. "Buffy? Where are we?" Buffy slowly lowered the sword as Angel continued. "I…I don't remember." He stood, and Buffy stayed back, watching him warily. He reached out and ever so gently touched her elbow. "You're hurt."
Buffy looked up, into his eyes. "Angel?" He pulled her close to him. "Angel!" She shuddered and wrapped her arms around him.
"Oh, Buffy…Everything's so muddled, I feel like I haven't seen you in months."
She felt her insides stir at his pain and disorientation. She closed her eyes, feeling her heart swell, and her own soul soar. She thanked God and every star for giving her her Angel back. Then she opened her eyes, and saw Acathla, as its eyes began to glow red, and mouth began to open. Her heart sank; she felt everything inside her break. He must have seen the look in her eyes, "What's going on?"
"Shh," She put a finger to his lips. "Don't worry about it." She kissed him deeply. "I love you."
"I love you." Angel whispered for only the third time.
"Close your eyes," Buffy said softly, barley containing all the anguish that was boiling inside her. She leaned in and kissed him softly one last time…then thrust the sword through his gut. Angel cried out her name and held out his hand. Buffy backed away.
As the room filled with alternating blue and red light, she screamed, "Tell him! Please, don't make the same mistake I did." But nothing changed. "Angel, I love you! I am so sorry…"
The light died, and Buffy watched herself as she fought the tears back, "I love you Angel…" whispered through the dark, empty room…then there was nothing. Buffy tried to clear her head of the dark memories, but even as she turned her back on the dormant Acathla, she saw Angel holding his hand out to her. Even after she'd stabbed him, sending him to hell…Her shoes clicked hollowly in the empty mansion as she walked out.
Xander Harris looked anxiously at the clock. Three minutes left. Only three minutes. The longest three minutes ever. He sighed and leaned back in his seat, dimly aware of the teacher droning on about the Executive branch…or something. He sighed again. It was only the third week of his senior year, and he already wished for summer. Well, not so much summer as for no more Sunnydale High, no more classes. Of course, after high school was college…would there be no end to school? Ironically, then the bell rang. He scooped up his books and hurried to his locker. Willow and Cordelia met him there. There was only one person missing…he tried to get rid of the thought, but it pursued anyway. There always seemed to be a gap, something missing, and 'extra' quiet or nothingness…or something. He pretty much knew what or rather who it was. Where was she? What was she doing? Had anyone heard from her? Was she still…of course she was still alive! Just looking at Willow and Cordelia he knew they were thinking the same thing. Buffy leaving had had an effect on everyone, even Cordelia. It had softened her. She and Xander's relationship had run 'bumplessly' since Buffy left. Giles had been really hard on himself, but that wasn't entirely abnormal. It was Willow he worried about. Not only had Buffy left, but Oz too. He had won a scholarship in Music, and mailed Willow- she had taught him how to use E-mail. But Buffy had been Willow's one true girlfriend. At first he had felt hurt that Willow 'needed' Buffy so much. Now he wasn't sure how he felt. Somewhat angry at Buffy because she had left, but at the same time, no one knew what she had gone through... "To the library, shall we?" Xander tried to feign cheerfulness, but failed miserably. There was little reason to go to the library anymore, but they all went anyway.
"Hey Giles," Willow said emotionlessly. This was the most depressing time of day for her; it was when she noticed Buffy's absence the most.
"Hello," Giles acknowledged all of them.
"I would ask if there's any word, but I'm pretty sure I know the answer." Cordelia said as she sat down.
"Actually," Giles started. "I have some news…nothing that would immediately attribute to…to positive." He added seeing all three faces brighten. "It seems that before Buffy left to battle Angel, she and her mother had a..a severe disagreement. She had just discovered that Buffy was the slayer. She has a lot of questions…and a note that Buffy left behind."
Mom,
There is so much to say- to you, Giles, Willow, Xander and even Cordelia; I don't know where to start.
I know it's hard to believe, but the whole "Slayer thing" is true. Me being the slayer has nothing to do with any choice or decisions you made, it's just fate. I'm sorry for all the pain my secret caused you, but I didn't have much of a choice. And, yes, I did try not being a Slayer, but it's who I am.
So much has happened in the last two years. If you ask Giles, Willow or Xander they can tell you everything. Almost.
You guys- thank you for always being there, and accepting me for who I am. If it weren't for you, I would never have made it this far. Willow- you shouldn't have tried the curse again. Had I known, I would have tried to stop you, because it's dangerous. But, thank you, at least I got to say goodbye.
Love always,
Buffy
"Oh God." Willow breathed. "Do you guys know what this means…She…she had to kill Angel, after he regained his soul. But she said she didn't know, and I sent Xander to tell her…"Willow looked at him sharply. "You didn't tell her!"
Everyone's attention riveted on Xander. "No," He said softly. "I…"
"You lied to me! When I counted on you most, when she did, you lied!"
"Willow, I couldn't…"
"You always hated Angel! But I never thought you were this shallow…"
"We'll discuss this later." Giles said in a tone that caused both to quiet. "Mrs. Summers, I certainly don't mean to pry, but why did you wait so long to tell us?"
"Because I didn't want to believe it. It was all so surreal. I thought she would come back. I guess because confronting the problem would make it real. That probably sounds stupid…"
"No, no that's understandable."
"So- can everyone explain to me what exactly is going on?"
* * *
"So, is she…"
"No- as far as I can tell, she's very much alive."
Joyce sighed. "I miss her very much and I worry about her."
"Honestly," Giles said thoughtfully. "None of us know what she has gone…is still going through. It took a lot of strength to do what she did; she must be in a lot of pain. "
She'll come back." Everyone jumped at Willow's voice. "She will, I just know."
She walked silently through the graveyard, then paused. There it was again, someone was following her. She continued as if she had heard nothing. Without any outward change she tensed for an attack from behind. Then she heard movement from the bushes to her right. She turned just in time to be leapt on. The momentum of her attacker carried her over, and she used it to kick the vampire off. She rolled effortlessly to her feet. Without really thinking about it, she punched him in the face, backhanded him with her fist twice. When he lunged clumsily at her, she stepped aside, kicked his feet out from underneath him, and staked him. He did the usual, and exploded into dust. "Amateurs, I'll bet he wasn't more than a few years old." Then, from the trees behind her, she heard a gasp, then a sound like someone leaving: in a hurry. "Wait!" She called and dashed after whoever it was. "Please wait, who are you?" She chased whoever it was into a clearing, then slowed. "Great." She turned, and ran into a man. "Oh, I… I'm really sorry…"
"Buffy?"
"Xander? Oh God!" He pulled her into a tight embrace, swinging her around in his delight. He set her down, then hugged her again. "Buffy," He said, sternly. "We didn't know where you were, or what happened. You didn't come to school or call…"
"It's great to see you Xander. Where's Willow and the others?"
"Buffy are you sure you're okay?"
"Great." She tried to smile. "Never better."
"Willow's probably on her way home. We tried to go to the Bronze."
Buffy looked at Xander. "Tried?"
"Long story. So..." Xander tried to think of a way to ask her all the questions that he had swallowed for so long. "Where've ya been?"
"Around."
"How come you didn't stop by?"
"I…I went to the mansion. I only meant to check it out…to…see if Spike really left town. I stayed longer than I meant to…"
"You never called." He tried to keep his tone light.
Buffy winced. "I…I know. I'm sorry- forgive me?"
Xander smiled. "Well, I guess the pain will fade with time…Hey, weren't we having a touching moment here?"
"I heard something." Buffy froze. She looked at Xander. He shrugged. Suddenly, something flew out of the shadows. "Xander!" Buffy grabbed the vampire as it went for Xander's neck. She hit him across the face with her fist. He tried to punch her and she caught his fist, threw him against a tree, and staked him. A growl caused Buffy to spin around. She gasped, there stood a female vampire, with power rolling off her. She immediately was reminded of the master. "Who are you?" Buffy demanded. The tall, slender vampire just sauntered into the clearing. With her black dress, and black hair she looked truly wicked, even for a vampire.
"You're that slayer, aren't you. The one Spike fled from."
"Damn it, I know who I am. Who the Hell are you?" Buffy felt her nerves flare. This vampire meant trouble.
"Nightshade." The vampire said distantly, as she was talking about a sunny day. "I was sent here. Because of you." She said, her voice dangerously soft.
"Oh- you were waiting for that really special slayer to kill you?" Buffy's blue eyes darkened, daring Nightshade to make a move.
"You see," Nightshade continued as if Buffy had never spoken. "Spike and his friends weren't happy with you."
"Nah, really. Well, gee maybe I ought to send him a Hallmark card." Buffy rolled her eyes.
"IT'S RUDE to interrupt. You made a deal with him. YOU make vampires feel human, and he thinks he has to keep his word. And when someone hurts Spike, I do something about it."
"Yeah, poor littl' Spike." Buffy said in Drusilla's accent. "The mean ol' slayer was make'n fun o' him. Hurt his feelings…Kill 'er for me."
"Make fun later, little girl. I have been watching you almost as long as Angel- maybe even longer, since you killed him. I know you; I know your strengths and weaknesses. I know your friends," Her look slithered over to Xander. "And your watcher. I know he will try to help you get Angel back. And I won't let you." She looked at her watch. "Well, I must be getting back. Ta ta." She began to walk away. "Oh, and Buffy. Be ready, I hate a cheap fight. The last slayer I killed was a push over, and it was boring." With that she disappeared into the shadows.
"Oh God." Buffy whispered. Nightshade's green eyes burned in her mind. She turned to Xander. "Oh God."