Civilised gentlemen

Saying things for effect

When a man says he doesn't care what the woman he loves wants, is he serious, or is he saying it for effect? This piece explains why you are less likely to hear so many statements said for effect in a Taken In Hand marriage than in some other kinds of relationships. (And no, this is not to say that Taken In Hand is better, merely to point out a difference!)

The power of a woman who submits to her man

Do not make the mistake of thinking that a woman in a Taken In Hand relationship is not powerful. She is very powerful, as Mike explains.

Do you 'meet as equals' or 'establish roles from the outset'?

How in the world can you create a male-controlled relationship if you meet and get to know each other as equals?

Who wants a slave?

Why are so many Taken In Hand readers uncomfortable with the idea of Taken In Hand wife as ‘slave’?

A Taken In Hand relationship reaches beyond the couple

Blush on the relationship between Gary's kindness and magnanimity to her and her kindness and magnanimity to others.

An overview of Taken In Hand

In a nutshell...

We should consider ourselves so lucky

This beautiful piece by Lucy describes her quintessentially Taken In Hand relationship and the wonderful man who loves her. Essential reading!

The man ordering for the woman in restaurants

Lisa explains how delighted she feels by the little acts of chivalry Rich does for her, including ordering for her in restuarants.

Giving each other what we need

Aurora on the peace and safety of a Taken In Hand relationship.

Holding coats and opening doors

A fun anecdote by Aurora.

Exit To Eden: the movie

Exit To Eden, the film, watched with Taken In Hand in mind.

Shades of grey

Paul cautions against black-and-white thinking in Taken In Hand relationships.

Narcissistic dominance vs Taken In Hand dominance

Healthy dominance vs narcissistic dominance.

Dominant men: D/s vs. Taken In Hand

Kiva likes the fact that Taken In Hand relationships are enjoyable for both persons.

My experience of taking my wife in hand

Forty-Something Husband shares his own story of what Taken In Hand has meant to him. If you are a man new to Taken In Hand, or if you know such a man, you won't want to miss this!

On being the servant-leader in my relationship

Stephen keeps in mind the “servant” bit of “servant-leader”. No wonder his wife spoils him!

Do with me what you will

Jeff describes so well that state in which a Taken In Hand woman feels safe, loved, protected, cared for, completely peaceful and driven to please him, her eyes saying “do with me what you will“, her heart open, her mind and body, his.

A good leader accepts that he is only human

In a position of power, a man must be mindful of his fallibility.

Natural flow

On natural flow as opposed to unnaturally dominant or submissive behaviour, with advice to men to put the woman before their own whims, and not to expect to be in charge of everything all the time.

A relationship of equals

Adam's vision of a Taken In Hand relationship – a relationship of equals, with both modern and traditional elements.

Authority in a Taken In Hand relationship

Authority is the right or power to enforce rules or give orders. Many Taken In Hand readers use consensual authority to enhance their relationship.

Taken In Hand saved our marriage from doom

Baltazar (husband of CondusedofHomeCounties) talks about how they moved to a Taken In Hand relationship and how he discovered that taking his wife in hand helped stop rows getting out of hand, and may just have saved their marriage.

An 1897 woman's “ideal of manhood”

Hit the read article link for some excerpts from an 1897 book whose author says: “Like every other woman, I have my ideal of manhood. The difficulty is to describe it. First of all, he must be a gentleman; but that means so much that it, in its turn, requires explanation...”

Civilised gentlemen of quiet strength and kindness

Taken In Hand men are civilised gentlemen of quiet strength and kindness.

How I turned the fantasy into reality

After the demise of Stephen's marriage, he was determined that his next relationship would be different. He knew that he needed to be the head of the household. Having found a woman who wanted that, he then set about turning the fantasy into reality. His major concern at first was how and when to use discipline. It is one thing to fantasize about giving a disciplinary spanking, it is another matter to actually give one, especially to the woman you love. But his new wife wanted him to be firm, and not just as a game.

Total obedience?

Do you think that the woman should be obedient at all times, in the sense that, aside from playful disobedience, she obeys without question come what may?

What you need to know about Taken In Hand

What is Taken In Hand about? A return to times past in which many women had no choice? Or stepping into a future free from prescriptions and proscriptions about the sort of relationships deemed acceptable? If you are in any doubt, hit the read article link now!

Is Taken In Hand about discipline?

Is Taken In Hand about discipline?