Strong women

DD relationships - the view of a mental health professional

Although we seem to have been attracting the attention of a number of individuals incensed by the fact that there are several doctors, psychologists, social workers and other mental health clinicians writing for this site, here is yet another person in the field who has something sensible to say about the kinds of relationships discussed here.

Correcting possible misconceptions about Taken In Hand

This piece by Sully is essential reading for anyone who is shocked by the idea of a Taken In Hand relationship.

As the head of our household I put my wife first

Gary points out that a good leader serves.

"No" means "take me"

The aim of "No means no!" is to give men a simple way to avoid actually raping a woman. The problem is that no does not always mean no, and the denial of that reality makes it more likely that men will make mistakes than if that reality were acknowledged.

A high-dominance woman taken in hand

Techiechic used to disdain women who prefer to liver under the control of a man – and then she realised that she herself is such a woman.

Forget femininity!

Louise doesn't think much of people acting like idiots.

I don't want to be submissive!

Like many women on this site who want to be actively controlled by their man, Sully finds the idea of ‘just submitting’ (to what, exactly, if the man is not exerting control?!) decidedly unappealing.

A man with a backbone can be very soothing

A Taken In Hand woman who is outraged about a decision her husband has made, may well be aghast if she succeeds in getting her man to change his decision. It can be very soothing to be with a man who holds firm and does not allow himself to be pushed about.

This man

This piece expresses the excitement many women feel when they are in a relationship with a man who wears the trousers.

From clues to a wonderful reality

A wise husband seems to have discovered that his wife needs a firm hand.

Enjoying consensual sexual aggression

On the joy of consensual ravishment in a Taken In Hand relationship.

Effect positive change by acting as if...

Instead of behaving badly to provoke your husband into taking you in hand, take this much more constructive course of action.

Resistance is futile

Or is it?!

My full and complete surrender

When a man is firm with her, Laura melts like butter.

Si vis pacem, para bellum

If you as a man want deep peace (and a lot of fun!) in your Taken In Hand relationship, be prepared to enforce compliance.

The power of a woman who submits to her man

Do not make the mistake of thinking that a woman in a Taken In Hand relationship is not powerful. She is very powerful, as Mike explains.

An overview of Taken In Hand

In a nutshell...

We should consider ourselves so lucky

This beautiful piece by Lucy describes her quintessentially Taken In Hand relationship and the wonderful man who loves her. Essential reading!

Women who take responsibility for their own actions

Women who take responsibility for their risk and who expect mistakes to happen are a better bet than those who don't. Yes, I know: it sounds obvious, doesn't it? But it appears not to be obvious to all men.

Impregnation

Why many Taken In Hand couples find the idea of impregnation erotic, and how viewing impregnation, pregnancy and breastfeeding from a Taken In Hand perspective can make what could otherwise be difficult or off-putting, intensely exciting.

I am a strong woman but I want to be taken in hand. Is this normal?

I am a strong, competent, intelligent, well-educated woman with a good career and a powerful personality but I want to be taken in hand. Is this normal?

A lifetime of denial ends

BlueRose calls it a lifetime of denial, but in some cases it is just an inability to pinpoint what we want. (I'm still working on it, myself!) In other cases, the denial is functional and important because the psychological autonomy of the person is too fragile at that time to handle a power exchange relationship.

The subjection of women

To all the men who understand: thank you. To all who don't: I hope that this will help.

My experience of taking my wife in hand

Forty-Something Husband shares his own story of what Taken In Hand has meant to him. If you are a man new to Taken In Hand, or if you know such a man, you won't want to miss this!

Introducing Kim.... “girl alpha seeks all man alpha”

Like most Taken In Hand women, Kim is what Eric would categorize as “resistant” – a natural leader rather than naturally submissive, and feminine, but not in a stereotypical way.

First there were the boys... then there was Bobby

Most men were intimidated by Bella. But not Bobby.

Are you the Conan the Barbarian type?

If you're looking for a Conan the Barbarian type, the requirement that consent be explicit is a real drag. DeeMarie has some advice for any Conans out there.

Could you be a slave, owned, property?

Does property always do what it's told? Does being a slave mean abdicating moral responsibility in the name of obedience? Why might a woman consider herself a slave, and why do Taken In Hand generally prefer not to a slave?

Being taken in hand was really rather super

For those for whom being taken in hand can involve being given a jolly good hiding!

From BDSM to Taken In Hand

KrosRogue is one of the many individuals who have arrived at Taken In Hand via BDSM. He says that he owes much to BDSM philosophy, which is, like Taken In Hand, based on primal desires derived from sadism, masochism, domination, and submission.

He's in charge. . . but I do it my way

Is there one undisputed leader in your relationship? If so, what does that mean in practice?

Is it true that a man shouldn't need to get physical?

It is often said that a man should not need to get physical to remain in charge of his woman. Tevemer points out the flaws in this idea.

How we stopped fighting and became happier together

A week after discovering the Taken In Hand site, Louise and her husband had a terrible row. To find out how they resolved the crisis and became happier together, hit the read article link now.

Taking it step-by-step making piecemeal changes

To read Jennifer's interesting account of how she has gradually explored Taken In Hand ideas with her husband, hit the read article link now!

An alpha female bares her throat only to her mate

A strong woman might want might well want to be cherished by a stronger man, and she might well not be generally submissive or want to be treated like a servant.

Being Taken In Hand doesn't mean being silent

A man in control would be wise to ensure that his woman feels ‘heard’ – accepting a man's authority should not mean ceasing to have a voice in the relationship. If only one mind were doing the necessary thinking and problem-solving, the other would be superfluous.

Violence in the garden

This piece is for all those whose desires and chosen paths in life attract disapproval from others.

In defence of books like Fascinating Womanhood

When reading books like Fascinating Womanhood and The Surrendered Wife, you have to apply some common sense and not lose your critical faculties. But they can still be worth reading, nevertheless.

A sword-wielding female warrior taken in hand!

It is often the strongest, most fiesty women who want to be taken in hand.

We're not all submissive!

Sometimes, being stuck with someone else's ill-fitting label can be a real drag. If you don't like to be labelled “submissive”, others should respect that.