Don't waste your life looking for something you already have, if only you could see it.

Charlene's post is an excellent concise introduction to Taken In Hand.

Is this philosophy of intimate relationships really as bad as some self-proclaimed ‘experts’ would have us believe?

Eroticising pregnancy brings husband and wife together and makes the whole experience very special.

It is sometimes suggested that the control in Taken In Hand relationships is not real, but it certainly feels real to those involved.

Being in a Taken In Hand relationship involving BDSM practices sounds like a source of great joy for this clearly very happy wife.

If you have a dog cage in your bedroom (but you don't own a dog), can your relationship be a Taken In Hand one?

As a child, Ian always knew he was different.

Don't mistake being in a Taken In Hand relationship for giving up your right not to be badly treated. As Dragon explains, when a man accepts the power to control you he also accepts the responsibility to protect and care for you.

When a man says he doesn't care what the woman he loves wants, is he serious, or is he saying it for effect? This piece explains why you are less likely to hear so many statements said for effect in a Taken In Hand marriage than in some other kinds of relationships. (And no, this is not to say that Taken In Hand is better, merely to point out a difference!)

Why are so many Taken In Hand readers uncomfortable with the idea of Taken In Hand wife as ‘slave’?

Not a film for the faint-hearted, but if you have seen The Night Porter and would like to discuss any relevant issues raised by it, post in the comments here.

InMyDreams says that submission is not something to give without careful consideration. For the benefit of new readers, note that many Taken In Hand women do not identify with the “submissive” label. This is for those who do.

One woman's journey from what she describes as “kinky sex” to Taken In Hand.

Kiva likes the fact that Taken In Hand relationships are enjoyable for both persons.

Many modern women have suppressed their deep desire for a male-led relationship because of societal pressure to prefer an ‘equal’ relationship. This may explain the massive growth in BDSM erotica aimed at submissive women. That it is not safe to admit to wanting or being in a Taken In Hand relationship may also explain why so many women have turned to BDSM, which bends over backwards to be non-sexist and pansexual.

BlueRose calls it a lifetime of denial, but in some cases it is just an inability to pinpoint what we want. (I'm still working on it, myself!) In other cases, the denial is functional and important because the psychological autonomy of the person is too fragile at that time to handle a power exchange relationship.

To all the men who understand: thank you. To all who don't: I hope that this will help.

Women sometimes say they want a Taken In Hand relationship but then when they actually start a relationship, seem afraid to give up control. If you are a man who is frustrated that your woman is not acting the way you think she should be acting, or if you are a woman who is being accused of not being submissive enough, not being feminine, or controlling with complaints, hit the read article link now!

Choosing to be in an unconventional relationship can be tough, but it can be well worth it.

If you're looking for a Conan the Barbarian type, the requirement that consent be explicit is a real drag. DeeMarie has some advice for any Conans out there.

One person's dream is another person's nightmare. The difference is consent, as this little story shows.

Does property always do what it's told? Does being a slave mean abdicating moral responsibility in the name of obedience? Why might a woman consider herself a slave, and why do Taken In Hand generally prefer not to a slave?

Before she found Taken In Hand, Untamedcherub enjoyed some BDSM play scenes, and recounts what she gained from them.

KrosRogue is one of the many individuals who have arrived at Taken In Hand via BDSM. He says that he owes much to BDSM philosophy, which is, like Taken In Hand, based on primal desires derived from sadism, masochism, domination, and submission.

This piece is for all those whose desires and chosen paths in life attract disapproval from others.

What is a Taken In Hand relationship? (This answer is aimed specifically at a BDSM / D/s / TPE audience.)

Couples in good relationships tend to be more sexually engaged with each other even in later life.

Here is a couple who clearly adore each other and who take pleasure in pleasing one another. I love the warmth and the humour and the natural, non-stereotypical way they seem to interact. This is not about the specifics of what they do, but about the underlying attitude they have. I hope you find this piece as charming as I do.

Why is BDSM so much more popular than Taken In Hand, and why is it that some BDSM folk are so disapproving of Taken In Hand?

In this fabulous article, DeeMarie argues that while love and fear might be incompatible emotions for some people, for others those two things are perfectly compatible.

How do you feel about the idea of in some sense being owned by a man? Some bristle against the idea; others – like Blush – like it.

Separating sex and dominance from the rest of life seems to me a decidedly bad idea. Because male authority and control is real for Taken In Hand couples, not a game, it has the power to infuse the whole of life with an erotic charge, making life altogether more exciting and joyful. Is it any wonder Taken In Hand couples are so happy together?!

More thoughts about dominant men and the mistake some insecure men make in thinking that being dominant means being right, superior, better than women.

Women who are high dominance tend to attract lots of submissive men. What is a woman to do if she is strong and possibly even dominant in some sense, but she is drawn to men who are even more dominant than she is, and not to submissive men? Try to suppress her strength? Try to become more submissive? Try to act submissive even when she doesn't feel it? What do you think?

When people ask whether you want to be “dominated” what is your answer? I never quite know whether the answer is yes or no. It depends! What does the questioner have in mind? People often think that because sexual dominance and service-orientated submission leave them cold, there is nothing sexual about their desire for their man to take charge. This piece explains what is really going on in such cases.

Ben and Clotos have been together for 33 years. In this article, Ben describes their unique relationship and their mutual surrender, and argues that “total ‘slavery’” leads to total freedom within total love.

I avoid labels, but for those who might be interested, here is my current thinking about the labels sometimes attached to this site.

The casual observer might think that Taken In Hand readers are saying that they want to be taken or taken in hand against their will, but what is really going on here? An investigation of the psychology of consensual non-consent.

This powerful, poignant piece by Aron was inspired by a comment by Susie to the effect that she would rather be with a dominant man who never spanks her than a non-dominant man who does.