There is a word you can use that is highly likely to give your lover an enormous amount of pleasure. It is not a word that you are likely to have difficulty bringing yourself to say. It is not a word you could not say in front of the children or your grandmother. It is not a word that would offend anyone. What is it?

If your man won't do as he's told, it is time to stop nagging and start taking action. You do not have to allow yourself to be put into the position of being a nagging wife. There are better ways of solving problems – ways that will empower you without destroying your relationship.

Scarlet has a red-hot message for her husband. I hope he's sitting down when he reads it: when Scarlet says she wants to be possessed, she really means it!

No one wants a controlling partner, but many want a dominant one. What is the difference?

Why does this kind of relationship work? Tevemer says that the more her husband asserts himself, the more she respects and desires him. Why does it work for you?

If you are in a new relationship, or have yet to find a man, and you want to be with a man who is lovingly dominant, you might like to consider this advice.

Joan enthuses excitedly about a mind-blowing experience of hers: the first time ever her boyfriend Alan took her in hand. As she says, being taken in hand has powerful effects!

When Caroline last wrote, she feared she had awoken a sleeping dragon. Now she relates how the flames felt. Hot stuff!

The other day, I heard the Queen song, I want it all, and have not been able to get it out of my head since. Sometimes I am so aware of how much there is to feel and do and experience before it's game over, that it is difficult to be patient. I want it all, and I want it now! If this sounds like you, you won't want to miss this article!

If you can't imagine why anyone would want to be spanked, and can't imagine what possible positive feelings it could occasion, hit the read article link. This powerful, poignant piece by Annie is very illuminating.

Some things don't change. Hit the read article link for a passionate excerpt from the 12th Century Provençal poem, Flamenca.

If a woman finds the idea of being taken in hand erotic, how can taking her in hand also ’work’ to modify her behaviour? Spanking would be a reward, not a punishment! Wouldn't it be more efficient to withhold spanking? Nooooooooooo! Hit the read article link to find out why not!

Why is it that most conventional people find themselves settling for stale, lifeless relationships with unsatisfying sex, whereas people writing on Taken In Hand often mention that their desire for one another is greater than ever even after many years?

If you feel no sexual arousal at all during serious disciplinary spankings, how can it possibly be erotic? And if it is, doesn't that mean that it is all just a kinky game, and not real? Hit the read article link for my answers to these thorny questions.

Okay, I confess! I misled you. This is not about the ‘M’ word as in ‘marriage’, it is about the ‘M’ word as in ‘maintenance spanking’. If you feel, or your woman feels, frustatingly unsatisfied by ‘maintenance spanking’, you won't want to miss this!

Read this review of Liberated Through Submission, by P. Bunny Wilson, or add your own review by clicking here and scrolling down to the ‘reply’ box.

Ben and his wife have been married 33 years. About eighteen months ago, his wife announced that she wanted to be ‘surrendered’ (as in The Surrendered Wife, by Laura Doyle). To enjoy Ben's delectable real life adult fairy tale, hit the read article link.

A woman's letter to her hypothetical husband.

We at Taken In Hand take our responsibility for the world's happiness very seriously. To that end, we are taking the usual step of making public some excerpts from a very secret (perhaps too secret, some women might say!) training manual for men. With thanks to Steve for daring to spill the beans.

Blush is on top form as she relates some subtle but incredibly hot romantic rituals she enjoys in everyday situations courtesy of her lovingly dominant husband, Gary.

Susie Joy enthuses about how things have developed over the first year of her marriage to Robert. Two things that helped were that he took her out of a stressful job, and that he spanks her whenever he thinks fit.

Many of you have read Blush's beautiful articles about her fabulously loving and wildly passionate relationship with her husband, Gary. But what does Gary have to say about it? Could he possibly be as wonderful as Blush says he is? I am thrilled to be able to present Gary's side of the story here. And when you read it, I think you will agree that the answer to the question I have just asked is a resounding yes.

Right from the beginning of their relationship, Stephen's wife wanted him to wear the trousers. She was not interested in a relationship based on so-called equality. She expects to be obedient. To her, obedience is not only a matter of respect for me and our relationship, it adds an erotic charge to daily life. Yes, obedience is sexy. It is romantic. It creates passion!

Some people like having lists of rules to adhere to, but for anyone who doesn't, Daisy argues persuasively for throwing out the idea of house rules and any other unwelcome micromanagement which might be causing resentment.

The Chain is the way I remind myself of how to keep our relationship going as well as it does. Not that either of are perfect or know it all, but this idea seems to working for us.

For more of Sha's piece, click the read article link.

After the flak we've been getting lately, I was pleasantly surprised to discover that The Yeti described Taken In Hand as: “A very cool site about married people.” Must be being sarcastic, I thought. (Well gosh, we seem to be regarded as in need of psychiatric help by even the nicest, most open-minded folks.) But to my amazement, I don't think he was being sarcastic.

In this exuberant and very interesting article, Issie explains that the way she and her husband choose to relate is not about pointless physical punishments but about traditional roles which obviate the ubiquitous battles for leadership and consequent disharmony.

Blush, on the subject of what happens when her wonderful husband Gary has disappointed her or made an error in judgement.

Annie on obedience and autonomy in her wonderful relationship.

Charlotte on why she loves Helen Andelin's book, Fascinating Womanhood.

Cynthia Turner introduces the book that changed her marriage and her life, Fascinating Womanhood, by Helen Andelin. Look out for future articles discussing this book.

Blush on the little things she does for her family that are so noticed.

For any woman who tends to be controlling, MamaKat recommends The Surrendered Wife.

Although rarely explicit, a woman will frequently give implicit permission to a man to do whatever is necessary to keep the relationship together. She then expects him to act on her permission... If the man fails to act in a timely fashion, whatever love the woman has for him will, in time, crumble into a loathing for which there is no human cure.

If you like Taken In Hand and you don't know this play, you are in for a treat if you read this article. (Fear not! No knowledge of archaic language assumed!) If you too love this play, you will want to know which is the best production available on DVD/video, and which ones to avoid.

Power and Love quotes this interesting article from Salon.com:

Women secretly want men with authority, but they fall for insecure passive-aggressive guys who view every aspect of life as a power struggle, or for cranky killjoys or petty sadists [....] The women have won, if you've won when you have worse sex than your grandmother did. Secretly they don't find these men very exciting, either. And they don't feel feminine when they're with them. [...] What's often lost in the insistence on equality is quality – how the people feel about each other, how much love they can give each other. We now feel queasy about the romantic language of our ancestors, who used the metaphors of slavery and devotion unabashedly. But is there another language with which to speak of love? Love does involve two people putting themselves in the power of each other. [...] The heterosexual act of love does involve women putting themselves literally in the power of men. And we no longer trust enough to do so.

Fascinating thoughts from Frank Nelson on introducing the intimate control dynamic in a new relationship, and on the challenges men face during this process.

Darrell called what he and Kathy had, a Benevolent Dictatorship. For Kathy's account, click the read article link.

Do you think that the woman should be obedient at all times, in the sense that, aside from playful disobedience, she obeys without question come what may?

To read about the night two decades ago that changed Karen's marriage for ever, click the read article link.