Strength

Are you getting through to her?

A husband in a Taken In Hand relationship needs to get through to his wife. If he is not getting through to her, his wife needs to find a way to let him know.

DD relationships - the view of a mental health professional

Although we seem to have been attracting the attention of a number of individuals incensed by the fact that there are several doctors, psychologists, social workers and other mental health clinicians writing for this site, here is yet another person in the field who has something sensible to say about the kinds of relationships discussed here.

"No" means "take me"

The aim of "No means no!" is to give men a simple way to avoid actually raping a woman. The problem is that no does not always mean no, and the denial of that reality makes it more likely that men will make mistakes than if that reality were acknowledged.

A high-dominance woman taken in hand

Techiechic used to disdain women who prefer to liver under the control of a man – and then she realised that she herself is such a woman.

I don't want to be submissive!

Like many women on this site who want to be actively controlled by their man, Sully finds the idea of ‘just submitting’ (to what, exactly, if the man is not exerting control?!) decidedly unappealing.

She may not know it yet, but I'm taking her in hand

It sounds as though GreySeal's wife is very happy that he has started taking her in hand – even if she has never heard of Taken In Hand.

Is Taken In Hand control real?

It is sometimes suggested that the control in Taken In Hand relationships is not real, but it certainly feels real to those involved.

A man in charge needs to be firm and steady

Stephen has some good advice for men who want to take their wives in hand.

Handle with care... and honor and fidelity

Sam has a message for men on the importance of fidelity, honour, and handling a woman with care.

This man

This piece expresses the excitement many women feel when they are in a relationship with a man who wears the trousers.

Enjoying consensual sexual aggression

On the joy of consensual ravishment in a Taken In Hand relationship.

What is the alpha male's secret?

Is it all in the voice?

Si vis pacem, para bellum

If you as a man want deep peace (and a lot of fun!) in your Taken In Hand relationship, be prepared to enforce compliance.

An overview of Taken In Hand

In a nutshell...

We should consider ourselves so lucky

This beautiful piece by Lucy describes her quintessentially Taken In Hand relationship and the wonderful man who loves her. Essential reading!

I am a strong woman but I want to be taken in hand. Is this normal?

I am a strong, competent, intelligent, well-educated woman with a good career and a powerful personality but I want to be taken in hand. Is this normal?

Alternative therapy

Warning: you may want to skip this provocative and daring article by LifeOfCuriosity if you have a weak heart or if you are not in a private location. However, lest that mislead you, rest assured that this article is nothing to do with casual encounters, and everything to do with the close and safe bonding of a loving relationship.

The subjection of women

To all the men who understand: thank you. To all who don't: I hope that this will help.

The carrot or the stick?

Don't be misled: the form often belies the substance.

A good leader accepts that he is only human

In a position of power, a man must be mindful of his fallibility.

Power connectivity

When Sam talked to Missy and connected up the Taken In Hand power cord in their relationship, the energy generated was thrilling!

First there were the boys... then there was Bobby

Most men were intimidated by Bella. But not Bobby.

Are you the Conan the Barbarian type?

If you're looking for a Conan the Barbarian type, the requirement that consent be explicit is a real drag. DeeMarie has some advice for any Conans out there.

Respect and responsibility

If you are a woman, have you ever felt uncomfortable dating a man who expects you to serve him? Have you sometimes been a bit too giving? What do you think about this quote from Pat Allen's book Getting to “I Do”?: “A masculine-energy man does not marry a woman who gives to him, unless he is a “little boy” who wants to be mothered. A masculine man marries a feminine woman who is available to receive from him, who respects him for giving, and who knows how to give back to reward him but always a little less than she gets. [...] Masculine men like problems and challenges. They like the chase. “Little boys” like Mama to do it for them; they don't want you to ask them for anything at all.” (p. 59-60, Chapter 4, Is giving masculine or feminine?)

Could you be a slave, owned, property?

Does property always do what it's told? Does being a slave mean abdicating moral responsibility in the name of obedience? Why might a woman consider herself a slave, and why do Taken In Hand generally prefer not to a slave?

From BDSM to Taken In Hand

KrosRogue is one of the many individuals who have arrived at Taken In Hand via BDSM. He says that he owes much to BDSM philosophy, which is, like Taken In Hand, based on primal desires derived from sadism, masochism, domination, and submission.

On being a man

A man must have the capacity to look beyond himself.

An alpha female bares her throat only to her mate

A strong woman might want might well want to be cherished by a stronger man, and she might well not be generally submissive or want to be treated like a servant.

A strong willed woman wanting a man to lose against

For some men, the ideal relationship would be with a strong, independent, fiesty woman... who wants an even stronger man.

Can you be Taken In Hand if you're not submissive?

What is the difference between being submissive (if you're a woman) on the one hand, and being Taken In Hand on the other? Or is there any difference? It depends whom you ask!

Practical hints for men - handling a strong woman

Carlf with some advice for men about taking a strong woman in hand.

Practical hints for men - times of stress

Carlf offers some advice to men about maintaining a Taken In Hand relationship through times of stress.

A reality check for critics

Is it true that a good man would not get rough with a woman who likes that? Or that women who want to be dominated are misguided and naïve and will end up getting abused? Or that they should settle for a bit of spanking, DD, or BDSM instead?

Love and fear

In this fabulous article, DeeMarie argues that while love and fear might be incompatible emotions for some people, for others those two things are perfectly compatible.

Happy living in fear of a man?!

If you think that women who want to be a little afraid of their men must be in need of psychotherapy or chemical help, this article probably won't dispel your illusions. But if you are curious, hit the read article link now!

Alpha male dominance

In a Taken In Hand relationship, the purpose of any physical force there may be is not correction but connection through dominant control. DeeMarie argues that if a man wants to be spanked, he has submissive tendencies that will be repulsive to some women reading Taken In Hand.

The resistant woman

Eric says he wants neither a dominant nor a submissive woman. What he wants is what he describes as a “resistant” woman. To find out what he means by that, hit the read article link now!

Don't forget your whip

This powerful article will thrill women who crave a man's control. Such women know that it is, as the writer says, sometimes necessary to “get beyond the polite and tasteful, and into the rape aspect of discipline.”

Who says you have to be submissive?

Women who are high dominance tend to attract lots of submissive men. What is a woman to do if she is strong and possibly even dominant in some sense, but she is drawn to men who are even more dominant than she is, and not to submissive men? Try to suppress her strength? Try to become more submissive? Try to act submissive even when she doesn't feel it? What do you think?

The alpha male and masculine power

Being a phlegmatic sort of person, it is not often that the mere presence of another person has the power to do any more than make me recoil from the olfactory shock caused by their halitosis or their overpowering aftershave. But very occasionally (about once a decade) I have found myself intensely affected by the mere presence of a man – so intensely affected that it has taken every ounce of self-control to appear unmoved. Why?